A heart made to be broken
by Nina.4444
Summary: A backwards world where Mark and Callie are enemies, or are they? Derek and Callie are happily dating, but secretly? Addison and Callie are best friends who would never let a man come between them, right?
1. Chapter 1

Callie sat frozen in the crowded hospital cafeteria, her wide smile remained plastered on her face and her eyes were still concentrated on her best friend sitting across from her. But her mind, her thoughts had frozen, frozen with Addison's last sentence, not that the redheaded beauty seemed to notice. She didn't seem to notice much lately. A metal chair to her right scraped shrilly on the ground effectively startling Callie out of her reverie. She took a shuddering breath as Addison turned to the latest arrival, Miranda Bailey and gleefully blurted out the words that had chilled Callie to the core,

"I'm back with Derek!" She almost yelled.

A grin spread over Bailey's face who congratulated Addison happily. For a woman who disapproved of hospital gossip she demanded all the juicy details with a grand enthusiasm. Callie felt her heart slowly constrict and her stomach twinge as she listened to Addison gush about her and Derek's rather passionate, exciting reunion that day at lunchtime when she had headed to his house for what Callie had thought would be just that, lunch with an old friend, old wife, _old lover_. Suddenly Callie forced herself up and both women turned towards her,

"Congrats Addy, I'm really happy for you hon, I've got to go though, patient, I'll talk to you later yeah?"

Her voice sounded different she noticed but the other two doctors seemed oblivious after offering a hasty goodbye and turning back to each other. Callie slipped out of the cafeteria an uncomfortable weight settling in her stomach as she swallowed repeatedly, desperately pleading the tears welling in her eyes not to fall.

She had barricaded herself in a small storage room barely ever used and clutched her throat that seemed to have closed when the first tear fell and she slid down the wall to the hard, cold ground. She drew her knees up to her chest and protectively wrapped her arms around herself. She felt humiliated, stupid, dumb and pathetic; she knew it was too good to be true. _Who would want Callie Torres when they could have the one and only Addison Montgomery? _They had been dating for nearly six weeks; it was Derek who had started things. It was Derek who had invited her to his place after a long shift one evening, cooked her dinner and complimented her like no man had before. It was Derek who asked her to stay, who emptied a draw for her stuff and wouldn't except money to help pay the bills. It was Derek who held her every night and kissed her awake every morning. It was Derek who made her feel blissfully happy and it was him who told her every day that he was lucky to have her in his life. He made her feel loved, she was not stranger to abandonment...boyfriend after boyfriend...she had wondered before what was wrong with her and then George had happened and she hadn't loved again...not until Derek. He had asked her to keep their relationship on the low and she was more than willing to attempt to evade the unforgiving rumour mill of Seattle Grace. They had dated, had dinner, followed with passionate sex many a time, talked, laughed and did it all again. He was a gentleman, _well until he started having sex with my best friend. _She wondered if it was the first time Addison and him had been together. She wondered if Derek had had an alternative motive for asking her to not spread the word of their relationship. A sick feeling arose in Callie's throat and more tears fell. A sob wracked her frame and she could no longer keep the devastatingly familiar feeling of loss, of loneliness, of hurt consuming her once again.

It had taken her nearly two hours to gather herself and pull her exhausted frame off the floor. Praying her bloodshot eyes would have returned to normal and the tremble of her hands wasn't noticeable she slipped out of the store room. Eight long hours of her shift still remained so she forcibly threw herself back into work. Two surgery's later, countless consults and a worried Christina, who seemed to notice everything lately and the sun began to set as she stepped out of the hospital. Immediately, she yearned for the chaos of emergency, the anxious questions from her patients and the other distractions the hospital offered. But the thought of running into Addison set Callie's feet in motion away from the building to the car park. _Alone. _She knew it wasn't Addison's fault but she knew she wouldn't be able to keep it together if she came face to face with her friend again. Suddenly an acute onset of anger flooded her body and she frowned. She was angry... with Derek...she thought the standard anger response to another breakup had faded long ago. She usually skipped anger and hurled straight into despair and loss. But no, she was angry. The thought of her not being able to face her best friend maybe, the thought of knowing that this could damage one of the most meaningful relationships she had spent time building with her red haired companion over the last year or so. She threw her body into her car and angrily swiped a few tears which had made a reappearance before zipping out of the car park and beginning the familiar journey to Derek's house.

Twenty minutes later she took a deep breath brushing her charcoal hair off her face and opened the door walking in. Her heels clicked on the wooden floors. She looked up to see Derek lazing comfortably in an armchair she had helped him purchase not a week ago. He looked up and smiled at her;

"Hey Cal, how was your day hon"

_Just perfect Sweetie I sat and listened to my best friend talk about how good you are to sleep with!_

"Yeah, great"

She forced a smile and watched his face visibly relaxed, her eyes then travelled to the couch where another man was eyeing her with interest. Mark turned away from her when she looked at him focusing on the game of football once again.

"Sloan"

She made a polite attempt at greeting Derek's best friend. _Not having to deal with Sloan...one plus to this mess._ Mark's eyes remained on the television refusing to acknowledge her; she rolled her eyes and ignored the stinging that Mark's cold attitude towards her always generated. Derek pitched a small handful of chips at his best friend from the bowl balancing on his chest.

"Dude!" Mark exclaimed outraged.

Callie turned back to her ...boyfriend? _Not for long_.

"How was your day" Derek arched his neck to look at her before responding,

"It was good, relaxing" He grinned roguishly before settling further down on the couch.

"Get up to much" She enquired, watching for any sign of guilt, remorse..."

"No, not really just been here with Mark all day watching footy, drinking beer...boys day"

She nodded in response almost mechanically, not that he could see her. As she stared at him a part of her wanted to pretend that she hadn't met Addison for an afternoon snack, ending with heartburn, and curl up next to Derek on the couch. Another part of her wanted to unleash the harpy deep inside on him and she realised her anger had dissipated as she had walked in the door. Instead she opted for escape as she turned unsteadily on her heel and walked away, bag still on her shoulder.

She missed Mark turning to his old friend and raising his eyebrows and Derek closing his eyes and running his steady hands through his hair with worry. Mark's eyes swept over Callie's weary form retreating down the hall and then admonished himself, as he forced himself to ignore the sympathy or was it pity that struck him. _It's Torres! You don't feel sorry for Torres besides it's not like she can know, Derek asked Addison to keep it quiet for a day or two..._But Mark couldn't rid from his mind the image of Torres' tired, gloomy face as she had walked through the door nearly 15 minutes ago...

He grabbed the controls and turned the television up.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello to all,

I hope you're all well and here's chapter two...I really hope you enjoy it, I'm sorry the chapters are so short but I'll try and update frequently.

I'd love to know what you guys think so I'm very appreciative of reviews.. hope you enjoy it!

**Chapter two**

"So"

"Shut up...just-" Mark was cut off sharply by Derek who had pulled himself off the couch and was now perched on the edge bent forward with his head in his hands. A moment later Derek looked up shooting a pleading look at Mark,

"What do I do? Do I tell her, do i...? I don't know what to do Mark?" Derek stumbled with his almost whispered plea for help, in response the plastic surgeon shrugged,

"I don't know mate, I just ...look I don't like Torres you know that but... it's not like you're going to keep this going are you? I mean do you want Addy or Torres?" Mark stared at Derek waiting almost apprehensively for his answer.

"I don't think I can let Addison go now Mark"

Mark looked up at him and nodded before responding,

"Then you're going to have to tell her"

Derek stared helplessly at Mark with the heavy dread feeling settling in his tightening chest. He buried his face in his hands again.

Mark's quizzical blue grey eyes took in his best friend. He knew Derek had waited for a second chance with Addison, he'd regretted leaving New York since he had slammed the door shut on Addison nearly a year and a half ago. He knew that Derek would be fighting for Addison. Suddenly Mark was hit with a surge of pity of sympathy towards Torres. He'd been around for the George fiasco and couldn't help but notice the similarities in the situations, well the main one at least. _Torres would be the one left alone again._ He frowned at the thought of her being cheated on _again_ and then his frown grew darker on his handsome face. Mark scoffed at himself wondering when on earth he started caring about Torres. And suddenly he felt angry..at the orthopaedic surgeon, at his best friends now ex, at the woman he'd despised since the first time they'd met.

"I should get out of here" Mark stated quietly causing Derek to look up. It looked as though he was about to object before Mark began talking again,

"Tell her tonight mate, don't let this drag on...besides you're always a jerk when you're upset" Mark smirked in his direction before wandering up the hall towards the toilet.

She stood in the bathroom and stared at herself in the old, ornate vanity mirror. She had never truly loved how she looked and found herself constantly comparing herself to others. When the whole George disaster had happened she found herself comparing her body, her features even her personality against Isobel Stevens and she hadn't been nearly satisfied. This time with the Derek catastrophe she found herself staring in the mirror comparing every line, every feature, and every curve to Addison's flawless body. Derek had managed to heal parts of her. He called her beautiful, he told her she was stunning and he had told her enough that she had started to believe it. Even if for just a fleeting second, but once again she was reminded of her exceeding inability to keep men around for long. Looking at her own eyes in the mirror she wondered if it was because she was too much or if it was because she wasn't enough.

She sighed her eyes welling with tears threatening to fall. She felt used, like she had just been a distraction until Derek could get what he really wanted. She was humiliated; the thought of walking back out into the lounge was nauseating. The thought of facing Derek again, facing Mark Sloan again. Mark was a mystery to her, she could never work out what exactly it was that made him hate her, but he always had. He'd be the first to criticize her and the last to congratulate if at all. To Addison however he was one of her best friends. Always one of the first to congratulate her _After Derek of course_ and he rarely had a bad word to say about her. The emotions, the feelings everything she had felt earlier that day in the storage cupboard came flooding back.

Pain, loneliness, hurt. Confusion, she was confused...maybe her mother was right. Her mother had no problem telling Callie she wasn't perfect, she was in a man's job, she could do with losing a few pounds, she was an irrational, impulsive decision maker, she was wasting and throwing away her life. Staring at her reflection she could clearly see her mother in herself, same eyes, same lips, same skin tone but where was the defiance, the authority, the boldness, the fire that made everyone respect Adriana Torres. She was so caught up in her vicious and critical self examination that she didn't hear the toilet flush or Mark entering the bathroom.

Marks POV

Mark walked into the bathroom, stopping suddenly. He hadn't expected Callie to be in there and just caught himself as an apology started to form on his tongue. _You don't apologise to Torres of all people. _And he felt the anger again, the annoyance, the frustration. He took her in for half a second and found the dark, almost disgusted look that didn't suit her face. He smirked,

"Finally seeing what we've all been looking at for so long Torres" He maliciously spat out. He smirked as he watched her jump but she didn't break her gaze and the frown on her face didn't dissolve. She didn't respond to him, making him even more annoyed, and his eyes narrowed a little more. He strode past her towards the sink bumping purposely into her back and his stomach lurched slightly as he felt her body fling forward and heard what could only have been her head smack into the mirror. He laughed bitterly, not allowing himself to turn around and he realised as the nasty snigger escaped his lips that he felt back in control and the pity, and sympathy had disappeared. Unfortunately for him the guilt...well the guilt came flooding back as he turned back around shaking his wet hands. His eyes widened when he turned back to face her and took in the bright blood running down her face and still she just stood there, staring.

"Shit...Torres! Fuck!" He exclaimed and reached for her yanking her, none too gently, backwards away from the mirror and tried to sit her down on the bathtub. Suddenly, she was moving, fighting him, trying to get away from him.

"Come on I'm trying to help" He muttered sourly,

"I don't want to sit there" Her voice was nasally, _funny about that_, but it was still forceful and determined and caused Mark to halt for a second. Mark eyed the bathtub remembering what Derek had told him before.

"_She was all stressed and upset so I told her to go and grab a shower or a bath if she wanted to you know...relax" Mark had nodded still shocked at what he was hearing,_

"_Anyway about half an hour later she called my name and I went to see what was wrong and she was crying..and I went in and ...I know I shouldn't have but...it's not like Addy knew about me and Callie and it would have been suspicious...right?" Mark cringed at Derek's added question, his uncertainty, _

"_I don't know...it just..happened, one minute she was telling me about this case she has and I was looking at her and then she just blurted out that she missed me and I kissed her and...she kissed me back and then..."_

Mark shook his head bringing himself back to the present and frowned, peering at the woman in front of him,

"Why the hell not?" he demanded

She sighed, she seemed to be doing that a lot today and almost stumbled backwards, out of his grasp, until her back hit the wall and she slid to the ground. She looked down,

"A simple sorry would have sufficed" Her sarcastic remark, wasn't nearly as effective laced with sadness and hurt. Mark rolled his eyes and walked out into the toilet before marching back in and seeing her still sitting there, blood on her shirt, her nose still bleeding. He fleetingly wondered if she could feel it or if the thoughts in her head were strong enough to numb her from the blow to the nose he had ultimately caused. The guilt was back.

"Damn it Torres!"He threw a wad of toilet paper at her and finally she picked it up and held it to her nose leaning forward slightly. Her hair curtained her face as he stood there awkwardly. Just as he opened his mouth to ask her if she'd be competent enough to treat her nose bleed she cut him off,

"I should probably return those to her" Mark spun around in surprise and saw a pair of black panties in the corner of the room.

"What?" He'd frozen, this wasn't supposed to happen, Derek was supposed to be the one breaking it to her softly, telling her it wasn't her fault and that it was him. Mark already knew that the typical old lines were unlikely to have an effect on Torres.

"To Addison" Her voice was cold, detached almost. _Well she definitely knows._ Even though he no doubt that Callie Torres had found out Derek's secret he still tried to defend his friends. Well, try and lie for them anyway.

"I don't think they're Addy's Torres" He tried to sound comical, like the idea was absolutely preposterous but even he could hear the lie in his voice.

"They are" She stated with a numb finality and then continued,

"She and Derek had sex in here today...and in Derek's bed...and the shower...and the couch if I remember correctly, hope it wasn't the one you were lying on" And for the first time in a very long time, Mark Sloan was lost for words, Dr Mark Sloan who held a PhD to his name couldn't think of anything to say.

"It's funny...she ends up with the sex in the bathtub and I end up with the blood nose" She chucked coldly sending a shiver up Mark's spine making him wish he never had to hear that laugh ever again.

"Look Torre-" But again she interrupted him,

"I don't expect you to feel anything for me Sloan- I know you hate me..you can thank Addison and Derek for getting rid of me from your life"

"That's not..." He failed to defend himself

"It's okay" She finally looked up, not at him but upwards as she heaved her body up before repeating,

"It's okay, tell Derek I've left will you"

And she walked out, away from him leaving him absent of anger but other emotions he had never felt in her presence, emotions he didn't want to have around her. He hated her, he always had. At the moment he couldn't even remember why, but he must have had a good reason. As he turned to stare at the offending, scrappy article of clothing Callie had spied he mentally cursed his best friend for putting him in the situation. For having to witness the hopeless, crushed look on Callie Torres' face that he knew would occupy his mind for the rest of the evening. He peered up into the mirror and sighed.


	3. Chapter 3

**A heart meant to be broken**

**Chapter 3**

Mark hesitantly moved down the hall with trepidation, almost at a snail pace. Why did this have to be his responsibility, since when was he made chief messenger. He'd rather stay well clear of the whole soon to be train wreck and get out of there. Callie's words echoed in his head,

_Derek had sex with Addison today..._Her voice as she had spoken the words was broken, vulnerable. It was softer than he'd ever heard her voice.

_She ends up with the sex and I end up with the blood noses_

The vision of her standing immobile with blood running down her face had unsettled him. A pang of guilt struck him remembering that he had caused it.

He looked up entering the lounge, when Derek turned towards him,

"Calli-..oh"

"Don't sound too disappointed"

"I just thought you were Callie"

"Didn't she leave?" Derek shook his head causing Mark to frown before speaking almost at a whisper,

"She knows Derek, she knows everything" Derek's eyes bored into his,

"...how?"

"I'm assuming Addison told her after lunch today" Derek's face turned white in a matter of seconds a look of horror swelling in his eyes as he realised the gravity of the situation and the predicament he was in.

"CALLIE!" He launched off the couch yelling her name, he moved swiftly through the grand house checking every room. Mark waited for him knowing there was no way she was still in the house, she must have slipped out quietly.

When Derek moved back into the room he stared at Mark,

"She's gone" _No shit Shepherd._ Mark watched his friend struggle with himself, before he pulled out his mobile and punched a number into the phone. Mark didn't fail to notice that Derek knew Callie's number off the top of his head.

"Cal...look..I know..I know you must hate me right now..I...I'm so sorry Callie, so so so sorry..Please call me back I...Just hear me out" As Derek threw his phone onto the couch glaring at it he once again stated the obvious,

"She didn't answer" Mark sighed,

"Look Derek she was upset she-"

"What did she say?" Derek looked pleadingly at him but Mark wasn't about to tell his best mate that Addison's panties were lying in the corner of the bathroom.

"Not much, just asked me to let you know she was leaving"

"Well what am I supposed to do what if she tells Addison?" Derek panicked,

"Oh my God what am I doing, what the hell am I going to do Mark?" He turned to Mark seeking an answer, in response he got a shrug causing him to roll his eyes and resume pacing in front of the couch.

A moment later he stopped turning back to Mark,

"I should go over there" Derek went to grab his keys and wallet when Mark spoke,

"Don't Derek" Derek turned to Mark,

"Why the hell not Mark are you listening? Callie knows I was with Addison, I have to stop Callie from telling her"

Mark frowned,

"Don't you think you should be worried about her a little?" Derek looked up at him, before sighing, his whole body sagging

"I am Mark...really..in all honesty I do love Callie..I just...I don't know it's different with Addison it always has been"

A moment passed, both of the men immersed in their thoughts until Mark spoke again

"Look just leave it tonight, I really don't think she wants to see you tonight...Derek it's not like you were exactly forthcoming with her ...and all that stuff with George...I mean it's kind of the same" Derek interrupted this time,

"I did not do the same thing to her that George O'Malley did" Mark just looked at him not wanting to tell his friend that the situation definitely held some parallels.

Derek turned back to him after running his hands over his stressed face,

"I thought you hated her?" Derek raised an eyebrow at Mark,

"I do, God it's not like I was doing Torres a favour, look no I don't like her and no I didn't like that you were dating her and really Derek I don't want to get involved in this, this isn't my ..." He trailed off,

"Problem?" Derek offered,

"No place" Mark amended

Derek nodded acceptingly before staring back up at Mark who had grabbed his keys,

"Why do you hate Callie...I mean really"

Mark shrugged,

"I just do...we ..clash, she hates me and I hate her, we don't sit well with each other" Even in his fluster Derek knew his best mate was flat out lying; one because Mark had avoided his eyes and ran a hand through his hair and secondly because Callie had once asked him the same question hoping to steal some best friend insight.

Derek hadn't been able to give Callie an answer to why Mark had always been so cold with her but that night he had learned how much it hurt her and confused her every time his best friend insulted her or ignored her.

Mark watched Derek thinking and took that as his escape, normally he would stay and be there for his friend but Mark needed time to think. He threw a quick farewell to Derek before slipping out of the house.

* * *

About an hour and a half after Mark Sloan had left Derek's place, Derek Shepherd had called Callie Torres' phone a total of 26 times. Derek lay on the couch in a sweat of guilt, not able to sleep with worry and occasionally he would pick up the phone hit redial and call Callie's phone again trying to catch her.

Across the other side of town a raven haired woman stood in front of a full length mirror in her underwear staring at her reflection. She had taken her own advice and as soon as she had gotten home she undressed and slipped into the shower. She raised the temperature hoping it would relax her tense shoulders. It worked a treat relaxing her body but as it did Callie felt the protective wall she had raised around her fade as well. Tears rolled down her face as the sting of rejection flooded her once again. Hadn't she cried enough for him?

When she stepped out of the shower, exhausted, she wrapped herself in a large, fluffy towel and moved out to the bedroom to collect her clothes. Once she had located her trackies in a heap at the end of the bed and pulled a shirt from her draw she dropped the towel intending to get dressed and climb into bed. But before she could the reflection in the mirror at the end of the bed snagged her attention.

Callie hadn't done this since she was probably eighteen or nineteen. She would stand in front of a mirror as a young insecure woman just hitting adulthood and pick herself apart all the time. She would clearly highlight her imperfections, her flaws and faults to herself. After a while she had grown out of it and had begun to accept who she was and was, dare she say, it content or at least okay with whom she was and what she looked like. But now standing in front of the mirror she couldn't help but revert back to her earlier habits as she inspected her body.

She surveyed her hair, messy from the whipping wind outside. It was knotty and hay-like, with the exception of the colour which was dull, boring black. _Not like Addison's vibrant red hair that always sat perfectly and almost glistened in the light. _A familiar malicious and cruel voice that she thought she had forgotten years ago spoke up from the back of her head.

A set of perfect blue crystal eyes flashed through her mind as Callie stared into her own pools of mud. _Lacking a shine, a sparkle don't you think?_ Her eyes moved to her chubby cheeks rosy from the nip of the air. She could picture Addison's flawlessly defined jaw perfectly.

Callie's gaze lowered to her broad shoulders, much too masculine for her liking, her large breasts which seemed to sit weirdly. Her eyes narrowed as she realised her nonexistent waist met her too wide hips and her stomach rounded. Her thighs, her calves, her arms, her butt everything. _Bit too much, you think love? About time you noticed!_

She thought of Addison her small, petite frame, her long thin legs that really did go on for miles. Her flat stomach and perfect breasts. She shook her head closing her eyes. It wasn't Addison's fault; in actual fact her best friend was completely innocent here. _You're right it's not Addison's fault that she's perfect. It's not her fault that Derek would choose her over you any day. It's not her fault! _She groaned ignoring the voice. She refused to think like this again, she refused to let that little voice cloud her vision again.

But as she opened her eyes and peered into the mirror again, the nineteen year old young woman made of flaws stared back at her.

**What do you guys think? I know there's not a lot of action, more to set the scene **

**Nina**


	4. Chapter 4

**A heart made to be broken**

**Chapter four:**

The new day had seemed to clear Callie's head. She'd slept horribly, but then again she couldn't remember the last time she had had a full night's sleep. Apart from the few that had occurred safely in Derek's arms of course. But they didn't count, _not now._ Being awake half the night had given Callie more than enough time to ponder her next actions. Really it had been a torturous, merciless war inside Callie's head for the past hours as one side of her, the side _she _was in complete agreement with told her she was strong and that Derek Shepherd was not going to destroy her like every other man she had been with in the past. Not like George, not like the boyfriends in between that had been a desperate attempt to fill the gaping hole George had left. The other side told her that this_ was _her fault _again._ She had brought this on herself. It was the part that told her she could change it, it was the tiny part of her completely insane and irrational mind that told her Derek would look at her again, George would notice her once more if she just improved those few things about herself.

Currently an hour before she had to be at work the former side was battling strong and her mind was set on standing tall and not giving Derek any kind of satisfaction. She was a surgeon, a great surgeon, a female surgeon in a specialisation dominated by men. She had made it, she was successful she had proved her parents and herself wrong, she was saving lives, changing them each and every day. She was a strong, intelligent, independent, educated and a relatively affluent woman who could get by on her own and would not, under any circumstances show the evil voice in her head any kind of acknowledgement ever again.

As she got dressed, she did it quickly almost with carelessness. Proving to Derek, to herself, to everyone that she was not going to question her appearance over a breakup.

She made her two pieces of toast, on white bread with butter and jam and ate them just like normal because she would not fall into the trap of blaming her curves for their separation.

And finally, she was not, no matter what she had to do, she would not let Derek kill her most successful relationship. Which turned out to be with her best friend Addison Montgomery.

She laughed bitterly at one point when she realised that her life at the moment sounded very much like a days of our lives plot rather than one of reality.

She took action, proving to herself that she could, and had rang Addison that morning asking her to lunch at a small cafe down the road from Seattle Grace. When her red-haired friend had told her, giggling, that she would catch Callie up on all the details Callie had almost groaned but plastered a smile on her face and forced happiness into her voice before confirming Addison would be there.

She'd gotten to work early and headed up to change into her scrubs, her dark blue scrubs, because she had passed her residents exam, she had done the years. She deserved it. She'd put her interns to work, finding somewhere that they'd all be relatively happy with. She was determined to not put effort into trying to avoid the people involved in the situation reinforcing her stance that she didn't care but for all her lack of trying she was managing it pretty well. It couldn't last forever though and as she headed to her first surgery she ended up finding them at probably the one and only time they'd been together all morning. Derek, Addison and Mark all stood talking to a patient with the chief. The woman was pregnant and had been in a serious accident. Callie had worked with her in the beginning fixing her bones, her skeleton her primary support system. She froze momentarily watching them interact with the patient and her family and a sick feeling washed over her as Derek gestured them all to enter the conference room and briefly placed his hand on Addison's back leading her in. Callie felt her guard slip just for a second but she caught it before it dissolved completely and forced her face to remain neutral. She narrowed her eyes and turned walking away from the scene she had been witnessing.

_Come lunch it would all be sorted out._

* * *

Mark's eyes had first inspected Callie Torres' appearance. He didn't know what it was exactly he was searching for but other than the slightly darker rings under her eyes that were expertly covered with foundation he found nothing. No one would know what had happened the night before, she didn't look a mess, she didn't look lonely, she looked composed, in control and powerful.

His eyes had then flickered to Derek's face. Obviously he hadn't seen her come in. Mark almost cringed as he watched Derek raise his hand and lay it lightly on Addisons back. Refocusing on Callie once again he caught the tiny second when her guard slipped, her mask and he saw it all. He saw the hurt, he saw the betrayal the pain. Then he observed her with curiosity as he watched her face smooth and she literally forced an almost too perfect smile on her lips before she turned to a nurse who had asked her a question.

As the nurse moved away seeming satisfied with the answer she had received he witnessed her expression change again. A look of complete and utter determination settled on her face as she straightened her spine making herself taller and turned from away from them purposely striding down the hall. He tried to identify the feeling that rose in his chest but had no name for it as he watched her disappear around the corner.

_He knew he shouldn't have gotten involved._

_

* * *

*****_

Apart from the one incident that morning Callie had managed to avoid Derek Shepherd all day so far. She congratulated herself as she walked down the street towards the cafe that Addison was meeting her at. _It was time to set things straight. _In one respect she hated what she was about to do, Addison had been blissfully happy in the past two days whenever Callie saw her she was grinning and smiling and the last thing she wanted to do was cause her best friend the hurt and misery she was experiencing.

_Had experience...she didn't care now, she was over it. Completely. _

But Addison deserved the truth, it wasn't fair on her. It wasn't okay for Derek to lie to her and Callie had always been protective of her friends, of everyone in her life. Convincing herself for the millionth time that day that what she was doing was a good idea, was the right thing to do she pushed the door open causing the small bells to ring. Addison looked up and smiled spotting Callie who returned it before walking towards the counter and Addison's eyebrows rose as she slipped behind it. When the aging woman at the counter had finished with her current customer she turned to Callie greeting her enthusiastically and kissing her cheek. Callie then stuck her head into the window of the kitchen yelling her greetings to the rest of the family who could be heard yelling back to her. After helping herself to a croissant and placing her money in the till Callie moved over to Addison. As she had walked in a bout of nerves overcame her, she'd quickly thrown a smile to Addison hoping it looked at least half convincing and bought herself some extra time getting her food. But as she turned to her friend the ravenous butterflies began swarming in her stomach again.

As soon as she sat Addison opened her mouth and out bubbled the words,

"God hon I feel like we haven't talked for ages, like really talked. I haven't even really given you the goss about Derek and I" She giggled and Callie cringed at the similarities of the fully grown woman's laugh to a young, smitten teenage girls.

Once Addison started she was a force to be reckoned with and somehow found a way to make sure Callie couldn't interrupt,

A couple minutes in and Callie began to fidget, her foot began to tap against her leg. It took less than another thirty seconds for Callie to interrupt her friend,

"Addison"

The force of Callie's voice stopped Addison who looked at her,

"What?" Callie sighed, swallowing the choking lump that had formed in her throat,

"Listen I ...I have to tell you something"

Addison nodded,

"What you're not dying are you?" Addison laughed jokingly, _figuratively or literally?_

"Ad- "

Addison raised one perfect eyebrow,

"Derek'"

Callie breathed after the sentence had erupted from her mouth, she looked up bracing herself, but instead of an enraged face she met a confused one,

"What? Cal maybe take a breath as you talk, I've heard it helps" Callie rolled her eyes at Addison's attempt at sarcasm,

"Addy, Derek's dating someone else at the same time as you, I mean..I don't think he meant to he...he just hadn't finished the relationship before you came along"

Addison looked aghast, the face Callie had been searching for before,

"What?...who?"

Callie looked down a slight blush of embarrassment and _shame? _staining her cheeks, after a pause Callie almost whispered,

"What would you say if I said it was me?"

Addison snorted before a bark of laughter blasted from her lips.

"Cal, one Derek's not the cheater I am...I cheated on him with Sloan remember and two you and Derek in what world would that happen" Callie felt as though Addison had just stabbed her with a very, very blunt knife. Straight through the chest.

"I know Ad, that's not what I'm saying, look Derek.."

"Callie, what the hell is going on? Come on can't you just be happy for me, I'm back with my ex husband we're happy, Cal I'm happy, finally"

Addison began to cut her croissant, Callie stared at her long, slender fingers that literally created miracles with a scalpel, lowering her eyes so that she didn't have to look into her best friends eyes she blurted it out,

"Addison Derek and I were together, we were together and then he cheated...on me...with you, the other day you know..."

Addison just stared at her

"What?"

**I'm working on the next bit right now...**

**It'll come faaaster if you let me know what you think :D hehe**

**Thankyou to all you guys who have replied I really really appreciate it!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A heart made to be broken**

**Helloooo, Chapter 5 for you guys sorry it's all a bit slow I've kind of hit a wall but you guys are great motivation so I thought I'd at least put this up here and see what you think...**

**Thankyou for reading **

**Chapter 5:**

"What" Addison repeated staring at Callie. She could see the disbelief in Addison's eyes, she could see that her friend didn't believe her and she knew that she was going to lose this fight.

"Addy, Derek—" Callie barely managed to get out the two words before Addison cut her off in an angry tone,

"Callie, are you serious, like really you're serious? Look Cal I get that you're hurt, George and Sean and Rick and those other guys, but George ok I understand that you're hurt and George and Sean, they were both absolute dicks, but come one...DereK? Derek and you?"

A bark of laughter escaped Addison's lips and it felt like a bullet in Callie's heart,

"Derek and you, Cal, Thanks for the look out, I get where you're coming from, since he's cheated before but like I said in what world would that happen?"

Addison laughed again,

"You and Derek"

"Addison I'm serious!" Callie's heart was aching; her best friend didn't believe her. In fact she'd just knocked her to her knees and kicked her while she was down. If Addison didn't believe her who else on this earth would?

"Addy listen-" Again her friend cut her off,

"Cal...please just stop"

Addison's tone was serious and she spoke slowly and deliberately as if she was speaking to an ill mannered young child. Her patronising tone washed over Callie who opened her mouth to retort angrily to her _best friend. _

"Addison why won't you listen to me? Here I am warning you that Derek's lying to us both and –"

"Will you stop lying for Christs sake Callie will you give it a rest" The fiery red heads voice raised well above the amicable, background chatter of the patrons who had chosen the small cafe for lunch. They curiously stared at the pair and Callie never one for attention battled with herself to speak up in order not to lose her only friendship that she had had in the last what, two years that had really meant something to her.

"Addison I'm serious!"

"Callie just stop, just please...stop" Addison shook her head, her red hair flying everywhere before abruptly standing up and moving out of the stall,

"Ad" But her best friend had turned and walked away without looking back her tall heels clipping the floor of the silent cafe as she strode out of the place, away from her. Callie stared at her best friends retreating back, cursing herself.

The dark haired woman sunk back into her seat as the people around her turned back to their own conversations and their own lunches. She wanted the ground to open up and physically swallow her, this was worst case scenario. This was the worst possible outcome.

Addison hadn't believed her,

The one woman who'd always had her back and promised to always have it as she would have hers had let her down.

_In what world would that happen?_

Addison had confirmed her fears. It was no wonder Derek had left her, now wonder he never wanted their relationship to be public. Addison had decided that she wanted her husband back and when Addison decided something Derek would bend over backwards to make sure she got it or it happened just...made sure she was happy.

A searing pain ripped through her chest and she realised she was jealous. A new wave of hate almost disgust of herself washed over her.

Envy.

She was envious, she was jealous of Addison. She felt sick. Sick from the emotions that were running through her, sick from everything she was feeling, sick of always coming second or last really. Sick and tired of always loosing and she felt sick from the few small bites of her croissant that she had picked at before blurting out her confession to Addison.

"ouch" A deep but familiar voice spoke from behind her and she solely swivelled around before sighing.

_Mark Sloan_...just great Just bloody great. Not only had a restaurant full of people heard the entire debacle but he'd witnessed it too and she was sure that any minute now he would shoot out some great line to cut her down just a little more...he was so good at that. She really had never felt more embarrassed, more humiliated in her entire life.

She turned back, away from him without acknowledging the man. She really wasn't in the mood at that time to hear his comments, she didn't want to be embarrassed anymore and he was a constant primary source of gold class embarrassment and humiliation for her.

She pushed away her croissant towards the middle of the table where Addison's abandoned one had been left. If Addison wasn't eating it she certainly shouldn't be consuming the buttery pastry.

"Are you done with that miss?" A timid, young voice made Callie jump in her seat. She raised her head and focused on the young girl with a black apron tied around her tiny waist.

"Oh yes thank you, I'm finished" Callie smiled politely knowing it had probably come out more like a pained grimace..._very attractive Torres_,

"Was there something wrong with your lunch Mam?" Callie began to shake her head and the waitress before she had even finished,

"No no no no, it was lovely thank you" Callie attempted to assure the woman. Their eyes met before both sets travelled down to the remainder of Callie's lunch. There wasn't one whole bight taken from it. She heard a snigger from behind her and felt her cheeks flush and grow hot. She sighed and returned her focus to the waitress,

"I'm sorry, no ...I've eaten her before, your food is lovely..today. I ...I just lost my appetite, but Thank you for asking I appreciate it"

"No worries Mam, have a nice afternoon then" Callie nodded as the young woman collected both her and Addison's plates,

"No problems" balancing the china perfectly in her small arms, she gracefully moved away from the table disappearing into the back.

Callie sat there for a moment lost in her own thoughts of Addison. The pain, the hurt of her not believing her. Of Derek, the betrayal, the pain and more hurt. His lies, his cheating, the typical breakup of a relationship of Callie Torres.

She was starting to think she should write a book, a manual, at least an article. Getting rid of men 101. Seattle's next best seller.

His voice broke into her thoughts cutting her, cutting her deeper than Addison's mistrust in her, deeper than Derek's lying that she was so used to.

"It must hurt right...getting dumped...for the hotter, skinnier, sexier model"

Her eyes narrowed and skin washed white. But it was only to try and attempt to barricade the tears from spilling down her face at the truth in his words. He was back to back with her and yet she could almost see the stupid little smirk of his painted on his lips. Suddenly she heard him stand and he spoke again before he walked away.

"And then being rejected afterwards, Addison chose Derek anyway...that's got to hurt...I mean Addison didn't even believe that you two could ever happen"

She didn't look up to watch him leave but once she knew that he was gone she shakily stood up and vacated the table towards the bathrooms.

Callie slid the stiff, metal lock shut and hit the ground when she heard it click. Now the tears did spill down her cheeks, her head throbbed, her throat constricted painfully and her heart stung as did her eyes.

Addison, Mark, Derek, Mark, Addison, Derek, George, Addy, Sean, Mark, Derek, croissant

A wave of nausea crashed over her and the impact caused her to fling her body up and she vomited, straight into the toilet tears falling too.

She felt sick. She was sick. But she felt sick...

Sick with herself, sick of herself

*********

Mark cradled his fist in his hand, he could feel the blood as he tried to stop it with his left and he could feel the pain radiating up his arm

What was he doing? What the hell was he doing? He couldn't understand, he couldn't make sense of anything.

As Mark had listened to Addison literally laugh in Callie's face when she had tried to be a good friend, when she had tried to warn Addison that her husband was a cheating bastard she'd literally, physically laughed in her friends face. Then she'd yelled at her and Mark had wanted nothing more than to get up and throw Addison out or at least get Callie out.

Instead he'd sat there, instead he hadn't intervened, instead he'd been the coward and sat and waited and listened to Callie be humiliated. He turned his head and his eyes followed Addison leaving the cafe. What was wrong with her? What type best friend was she?

_What type of friend was he?_

Then again he was never her friend. Enemy, foe, adversary, opposition, rival. But Mark knew that while Callie Torres was a fireball and while she never usually was one to sit there and let him insult her instead opting to get a few back at him that it was never really a two sided fight. Never.

She never instigated anything she would defend herself and hold her own but really it was him that started everything. So really he was a predator or an attacker. The thought made him feel sick.

Then he was confused. He'd defended her in front of Derek, to Derek and he'd done it on several other occasions during just the past week. He'd defend her as other people attacked. But ...then when he was in front of Callie the cruel, unforgiving, malicious comments seemed to spring effortlessly out of _nowhere._

Looking back down the street he could see that Callie hadn't followed him out of the store and his pace faltered. Should he go back?

No. If there's one person she would not want to see right now.

He sighed and moved passed the brick wall his fist had met in his confused, angry, rage before almost running back towards the hospital furious with Derek, furious with Addison but more furious with himself than anyone else.

**Please review!  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**Heart made to be broken,**

**Chapter 6**

At ten thirty the next morning Dr. Mark Sloan walked out of OR 1 stretching his arms high above his head in order to reposition his muscles that had been stuck in the same position for the last three hours. The man headed towards his office was stopped short however by a page,

_ER 7 MVA, ETA 4 min_

It wasn't until eleven thirty that Mark finally shut the door to his office after managing the multiple burns injuries the accident had arrived with. His chair glided back as he sat down and he sighed. The events of yesterday were still playing over and over again in his head. He couldn't believe how stupid he had been, how much of an idiot.

_Why the hell did he feel the need to say that? It's not like she wasn't humiliated enough already._

He sighed and leaned forward opening a new case to try and take his mind off everything. Unfortunately for the surgeon it didn't work too well.

It wasn't until midday also known as Mark's coffee run did he find out that Callie Torres was MIA. A surgeon standing in the line before Mark turned to him asking if he had seen Dr Torres at all that morning as she was due in surgery in five minutes for a patient he had consulted with. He'd stared at the doctor and felt his heart constrict, forgetting about his coffee he moved out of the line his eyes sweeping the cafeteria for a sign of her raven locks. Before he knew it he had worked his way up the floors checking patients rooms, storage rooms, on call and waiting rooms. He didn't see the nurses look at him strangely and continued on as if it was the most normal thing in the world until suddenly he was standing in front of Derek on level four. A large, chesire grin formed on Derek's lips when he saw his friend,

"What?" Mark questioned already having a vague idea of what it was, or who it was that was on Derek's mind,

"Addison and I are going out tomorrow night, She finally agreed to have dinner with me" Derek grinned towards him and Mark forced a smile on his lips,

"Congrats mate, hey...you haven't seen Torres today have you she's supposed to be in surgery in about...two minutes ago?" Derek's face fell and then he turned back to Mark considering him,

"Nope I haven't heard from her since...you know"Mark nodded, ignoring Derek's first question. He looked up towards Derek questioningly. Mark hadn't heard anything about Addison or Callie from Derek until now since the lunch the day before. Since he'd acted like the world's hugest idiot and basically kicked Callie while she was done. He ran his hands through his hair wondering if Addison had confronted his best friend at all and what his next move should be.

Callie lay on her back staring at the ceiling fan revolving with great speed above her head. She had no idea how long she had been lying there but it was since she had woken up from her sleep hot and bothered. She'd ripped her shirt and pants off and flicked the fan on full bore. She had tried to open the window but the Seattle air was hot which was a rarity in itself. Her arms hung listlessly off either side of the bed. She made no attempt to move when her eye caught the screen of her phone light up from her chest of drawers. She ignored the grumble of her stomach that was easily audible. It was only when a cramp like shooting pain erupted in her stomach that she was forced to roll on her side bringing her knees to her chest. She wasn't sure when she'd eaten last all she knew was that she had gone to bed as soon as she'd gotten home yesterday afternoon.

Eventually her bladder decided enough was enough and forced her to get out of bed. After she slowly pulled herself out of the sheets she picked up her phone from the dresser glancing at it. She stopped suddenly as she went to move further towards the bathroom stepping back and picking up her phone again.

Missed calls:  
_Derek 21_

_Chief Webber 6_

_Christina 5_

She threw her phone down; she didn't want to talk, to anyone really. She cursed as she realised she hadn't rung the chief after she had taken off early the day before. She stared into nothing as she thought in disbelief that she hadn't even thought anything of leaving after her lunch with Addi...

_Addison_

She'd had no calls from Addison. Callie's heart stung, she wasn't sure what that meant,

Either she had ignored everything Callie had told her.

Or

She had confronted Derek and he'd denied everything

Maybe that's why he had called her twenty something times

But if anything else had happened she knew her best friend would have rung her by now, or turned up at her door or anything and somehow Callie knew that she had just lost her best friend.

Now...she was alone, she sighed and left the room. She passed her mirror that she had covered with a light sheet when she'd gotten home from Derek's the other night. The night her life had fallen apart at the seams.

As she walked down the hall a silver glint caught her eye. As she moved closer she realised what it was she was seeing from under the bathroom cupboard. Her scales. She couldn't remember the last time that she'd actually had them out. Forgetting all about her full bladder she bent down and pulled them out into view. She stepped on one foot at a time; for a second she braced herself on the towel rack. She watched the numbers tick over, ten at a time really, 40, 50, 60 ... for a moment she simply stood and looked at her feet.

She felt sick downright sick. Tears welled up in her eyes and she stepped off them backing away from them, when she hit the wall the tears slipped down her face.

_How had she let herself get like this, how had...hadn't she noticed? What did everyone else think? No wonder Derek didn't want to take her outside, to meet people, she understood completely. She didn't want to go outside._

For a second she stood letting her silent tears wash down the drain before her body began to move again...she pushed herself off the wall and padded quickly down the hallway moving purposely into her room and violently yanked the sheet off the mirror letting it pool on the floor. She stared at herself. She'd seen the number, but now she was seeing the picture that went with it. She felt her eyes water again and her throat clog up.

_Who had she become_? She never used to be like this,

She put her hand on her stomach grabbing at the fat, her thighs, her arms. She felt sick,

_What the hell was she doing, she had to do something about it_. In a dazed panic she searched her apartment. Throwing draws open until she finally put her hands on her tights, she pulled them out and with shaking hands she began to pull them up her legs. She switched her shirt to another and turned back to the mirror. Her eyes widened. Her legs were like stumps,_ where did her toned and tanned legs go? _

Seconds later she had stripped again refusing to look in the mirror and pulled her tracks suit pants up over her hips. They were heavy on her legs and already her body began to heat. But she didn't have time to think, there was no time to think. Instead she piled her tangled hair up on top of her head and pulled a hair tie around it. Without a second thought she moved to her front door and headed down the stairs of her apartment building.

She could hear her feet hitting the concrete beneath her feet as she ran down the footpath she'd been running for nearly twenty minutes now. All of a sudden the air was ripped from her lungs; she gasped and gripped her chest. She clutched her throat trying to force air back into her lungs. She staggered off the path and literally fell to her knees on the grass coughing. Between coughing and gasping for air she'd managed to choke herself. Callie gagged her eyes widening as she struggled for air until she abruptly vomited.

She fell lower to the ground as stars exploded before her eyes and the last thing she heard was the concerned voice of a passerby that had stopped next to her just as darkness took her over.

**Please reviewwww we're getting there slowly :D**

**I'm really sorry if you read the first version of this chapter, i originally wrote and posted it very late at night and when i read it back the next day i quickly deleted it...it was terrrrrrrible!**

**But please let me know what you think of the story :)**

**Thanks  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**Heart made to be broken**

**Chapter seven: **

Callie Torres woke slowly; she could hear distant noise but didn't even begin to think about the source of it. It was familiar whatever it was, comforting. She began to shift around in her sleep and quickly realised she was lying in a bed...somewhere. It was then that everything came flooding back to her. Running along the concrete footpath, gasping for breath, falling, darkness.

She opened her eyes to see bright lights and felt the itchy sheets beneath her. Hospital. No wonder it had felt so familiar someone had rung an ambulance. She looked around, dazed, for someone she knew as humiliation welled inside of her. She wondered who had already seen her,

Addison, Derek, George, Stevens, Sloan all of the above most probably. She sighed feeling a wave of exhaustion wash over her even though she had just woken. She had to get out of there, now ...before she could have any visitors, before she had to sit through a lecture about self care and bla bla bla... Callie looked down and followed the tube attached subcutaneously into her wrist. She reached her other trembling hand towards it and clumsily pulled out the drip from her arm. No amount of care however could stop the stinging pain that shot up her arm afterwards. She then grasped the thin blanket between her fingers and pulled the blanket off the bed and slowly swung her feet over the side of the bed before sliding down until her feet hit the ground and she stood upright using the side of the bed as support.

It was only then that she realised where she was. She saw enough of the labels on the wall, the bracelet around her wrist and the logos on the charts to deduce that she was definitely not at Seattle Grace Hospital, this was Mercy West. She felt a gush of relief swell inside of her and huge weight lift from her shoulders. Her body trembled as a nurse suddenly rushed in,

"Dr Torres! You really can't be up dear" Callie just looked at her,

"I'm sorry I understand it's frustrating but I need you to just lie down for a second so I can do your obs again and I'll page the doctor" The nurse in purple scrubs smiled at her and Callie let her hold her arm while she eased herself back into the bed. The woman then picked up the drip,

"You've had a good sleep love, just what you needed I think. It's the thirteenth now dear, you've been asleep since yesterday afternoon" The lady smiled at her as Callie's eyes widened she had slept for...nearly 18 hours. Her thoughts were cut off however when she spoke again,

"You know there are a lot of people who would love to meet you Dr. Torres, there have interns, nurses surgeons and Doctors alike poking around the halls trying to get a glimpse of you" She smiled kindly at Callie who gave her a small smile in return, blushed and shook her head. She wasn't used to attention; she didn't like attention...at least not on her. That and she didn't believe that anyone would want to meet her, what had she done? Not a lot. Not a lot compared to Add—anybody really...Why would they want to see her?

Dr. Derek Shepherd definitely. The leading neurosurgeon in Seattle. Dr. Addison Montgomery well known neonatal surgeon certainly and not to forget Dr. Mark Sloan ENT and Plastic and Reconstructive surgery or Major Dr. Owen Hunt army trauma surgeon. But Dr Callie Torres of orthopaedic surgery? What had she done? There was no brains or babies. No war or irreversible burns or crippling defects to fix. It was carpentry, people had always been disbelieving when she explained which specialty she belonged to. Never believing her and then raising a questioning eyebrow, the daring ones even asked why on earth she had chosen that field. Why had she chosen that field? It was always been so clear, she had always been so driven, so directed and determined in her job but now...now she wasn't sure what she did or why she was even doing it?

The nurse's hand gently touched her wrist wrenching Callie out of her consuming thoughts. She looked up into the older woman's eyes,

"For such a famous surgeon you haven't taken your own drip out very carefully" Callie again just watched her unsure where exactly it was that she was going,

"You've got to take care of yourself love" Callie nodded flashing her, what she knew to be a very unconvincing smile.

As the woman began to reinsert her drip the doctor walked in. The man looked to Callie,

"Dr. Torres it's so nice to finally meet you, how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine" The nurse, whose name as Callie found out was Anita automatically reached for the water as Callie's voice was scratchy and broken,

"Ok well I should be able to have you released by this afternoon I just need to grab some notes and have a chat about a few things"

"Is there anyone you'd like me to Call Dr. Torres" Callie shook her head at Anita but before she could reply the doctor cut her off,

"Dr Torres you know the drill I'm going to need confirmation that someone will take you home or I'll have to keep you here for another twenty four hours, who would you like me to ring?" Callie looked towards the window and her heart sank into her stomach, she was never going to get out of there without having someone take her home,

_Great._

Who the hell was she going to call though? One, two days earlier Addison would have been there before she had arrived in the ambulance and now...

Now there was no way on this planet that she was going to let the doctor call Addison Montgomery to come and sign her lying, cheating, fake best friend out of the hospital.

Derek ...well he would have been second on the list...not any more.

Who else, bailey, chief, Mark, the other attendings, no way.

George.

Briefly she actually considered asking the nurses to contact George O'Mallie her ex husband to come and get her from the hospital before she shook her head,

_Was she insane _She'd rather call Mark

Mark. No she couldn't call him..no way. No way in hell.

_Finally seeing what we've all been looking at for so long, Torres._

_Hotter, skinnier, sexier model_.

The words were haunting her. They found her at the worst times, all the time. Any second when she had a moment to think, a moment to breathe and they were back bringing with them the number on the scales, the image, ...She shook her head focusing,

Basically it was down to the interns and she knew within seconds that Christina Yang would be the winner. Isobel. Meredith. Big no and bigger no. Christina it was, Alex would have been a close second. Callie startled as Anita moved away from her body done with fixing the tube in place. The loss suddenly made her feel lonelier, vulnerable.

"Christina Yang, she's a doctor at Seattle Grace could you ring her please, just...make sure it's her please" Anita nodded and promised she'd be back later before moving from the room. The doctor however moved closer, her chart in his hand, and took a seat on the chair beside her bed,

"Dr Torr-"

"Callie please" the man nodded,

"I just wanted to ask you about your nutrition at the moment from your blood te-" Callie stuck her hand up and cut the doctor off shaking her head towards him,

"It's alright I promise I've just been busy lately, lots of cases and all you know how it is" The doctor looked at her for a second before nodding,

"Okay Callie...but you keep an eye on yourself alright" She nodded,

"You've been here for over 20 hours so I'll let you go, you know what you're doing so just keep an eye on everything alright" Callie nodded,

"Thankyou Dr..?"

"Greene"

"Thank you Dr Greene I'll make sure I keep on top of it, thanks for everything" He nodded and went through various other procedures Callie had heard and said a million times over before leaving the room,

Anita had been back and told Callie that she had spoken to Dr. Christina Yang who was now on her way and forty minutes later a frazzled, harried looking woman strode passed her room, a second later Christina moved back and turned into her room,

"Callie?" A very obviously confused Christina Yang walked through the doors and into her room,

"Hey I'm sorry...I'm sorry I had to ring you ...they wouldn't let me out without someone to sign me out, could I ask you for a lift home" Christina looked at her for a second before not hesitating to reach forward and pick up her chart,

"Christina!" The younger woman raised an eyebrow at her,

"That orange spot above your head means that you're supposed to be under supervision for the next 24 hours, I want to know why if I'm responsible for you and I have a small inkling you're not going to tell me the truth."

So Christina Yang read through her chart, she then signed Callie's discharge papers and physically pushed Callie out of the hospital. Once the pair settled in the car the argument had broken out. Christina had promised to take good care of Callie and was fully prepared to make good on her promise while it seemed Callie herself was under the impression she would be returning home.

She was wrong.

It ended with a compromise on both parts...and a friendly threat. Christina agreed to take Callie back to her apartment to collect a few things but then she was to stay at Christina's overnight who would then drive Callie home the next morning.

It was either that or Christina assured Callie she would be marching to the chief and declaring Dr. Calliope Torres unfit for practice tomorrow morning.

**Please review and let me know what you think!**

**Nina xxx**


	8. Chapter 8

**A heart meant to be broken**

**Chapter 8:**

Christina waited patiently in Callie's lounge/dining room while Callie pottered around her apartment packing things for her overnight stay at Christina's. Before she began to pack she travelled straight down the hall and into her bathroom to brush her teeth. It was while she was looking around the bathroom as the toothpaste foamed in her mouth that her eyes caught sight of the scales and the events of the day before came floating back through her mind.

Callie mirrored her own movements of yesterday morning which all seemed so long ago now. She reached down and pulled the silver scales into view before stripping her clothes off. She watched the numbers tick passed and closed her eyes tightly not wanting to see. She knew that there wasn't really any way that her weight would have changed within the last twenty four hours but a small part of her prayed that anything had been lost.

When she opened her eyes and looked down her whole body slumped. The number was the same as the last time she'd weighed herself. She stepped off the scales and quickly pulled her clothes back on her cold body. After, she pulled open the bathroom door almost angrily before moving to her own room. When she got there she found the first piece of paper she could get her hands on and grabbed a pen off her dressing table.

_71.00_

She stared at the number in utter disgust. It couldn't stay. No wonder what had happened had happened. She had no one to blame but herself. She couldn't blame Derek and she couldn't blame Addison. Or George..any of them.

It couldn't stay, something definitely had to change. She had to change. And starting tomorrow morning she would.

* * *

To be honest, Christina Yang was worried. The strange phone call she had received from Mercy West the day before, asking her to pick up a hospitalised Callie Torres had completely shocked her. She watched her friend from the kitchen as Callie got settled on the brown couch Christina had pointed her towards. Suffering from, according to her chart, exhaustion, unsatisfactory nutrition and severe stress Christina had been worried ever since leaving the hospital with a quiet Callie. She had watched the surgeon over the last few days. The confident, assured kick ass ortho chick had become withdrawn and it was only after Christina had got the call that she realised it had been several days since she'd even heard from the woman. She knew that she had seen the change in Callie and she was kicking herself for passing it off as nothing.

She poured Callie a glass of water and offered to grab her some food to which the woman declined.

"Would you mind if I just went a grabbed a shower Chris" Christina shook her head seeing the weariness in her friend's eyes,

"No, go for it Cal. There's towels in the cupboard in the bathroom help yourself. While you're in there I'll make up your bed, so you can go straight in there if you want" Callie smiled but it didn't reach her eyes,

"Thanks Christina really" She nodded and watched Callie move towards the bathroom her eyes running over her with a puzzled expression slowly contorting her face.

_What was going on?_

Just over an hour later Christina had hopped in the shower after getting Callie settled on the couch. She hadn't approached the subject of her hospital visit yet but Callie knew it was coming. As an old episode of friends started on the screen she snuggled into Christina's couch pulling the sleeping bag further around her and she heard the door swing open,

"Christina you home?" A familiar voice called out from behind her and Callie sat up quickly just as Owen moved into the room,

"Hi, Christina is in the shower" She said hurriedly before he could even speak,

"Hey Dr Tor-"

"Callie..please" She looked down awkwardly,

"Owen" He stuck out his hand and she shook it,

"Sorry we haven't really been introduced have we?" Callie shook her head,

"Not really, how are you liking Seattle?" He smiled,

"It's good, weathers a little different but it's nice all the same" She nodded,

Thankfully Christina walked out at that moment dressed in a towel,

"Hey I thought I heard you, sorry I didn't warn you Cal" Callie shook her head,

"I'm just sorry for imposing I can head home Chris rea—" She was cut off when Christina held her hand up at her silencing her sentence,

"Nope, I told you I'll drop you off in the morning before work you're staying here tonight" Callie sighed quietly in defeat.

The three of them ate dinner together lazing on the couches. As Christina placed the plate of food in front of Callie, she grimaced. There was no way she could eat that, looking at it made her stomach turn. Christina seemed to catch on watching her,

"You don't have to eat it all Cal just a few bites" Callie nodded,

"It smells great Chris thanks" she said, Owen grinned from beside Christina,

"Well she's had enough practice cooking it" Christina goosed him in the side to which he just laughed in response,

"It's the only meal I can make" Callie smiled at the happiness of the two feeling a painful sting in her heart at the affection. It was what she missed most the affection and the laughing,

Having somebody to laugh with, to make laugh and to be made to laugh by them. Callie picked at her meal not really eating it, however delicious it looked just by smelling the magical scent she could feel the pounds piling on.

Finally after Owen had vacated the room heading for the shower Christina turned on Callie. The latter jumped up as Owen made his exit collecting their plates and heading towards the kitchen. Christina played along for a little while, but Callie knew that she wasn't going to be able to avoid her questions forever. Once they'd finally rinsed off the plates and Callie began to fill the sink Christina spoke,

"Okay one: I have a dishwasher so you can empty the sink and two: what's going on?" Callie sighed and finally turned to Christina,

"It was nothing Chris, seriously"

"Obviously this is far from nothing Callie you were hospitalised for it!"

"Look I'm just stressed okay, there's a lot going on and I just need a good night's sleep. I'm sorry that I had to call you. Really though I promise it's nothing, just family and work stressing me out and I haven't been paying attention really"

"Your chart said you were suffering from unsatisfactory nutrition"

"It's the same story Chris don't worry I won't be that stupid again, I'll keep an eye on things" She promise,

"I didn't say you were stupid Cal and I would have kicked your ass if you hadn't rung me bur you've got to look after yourself Cal"

As Callie opened her mouth to retort Owen walked in from the bathroom his hair still dripping,

"Oh sorry guys I'm interrupting" Callie shook her head and walked back into the lounge and began to hastily gather the blanket,

"No, no Owen actually I'll leave you guys to it, I'm exhausted I'll head to bed, thanks for everything" She smiled and Owen smiled back at her. Christina however frowned and reached up and laid the back of her hand on Callie's forehead,

"Take a water to bed" Callie sighed,

"I am a doctor too Yang, you know...a little longer than you but hey thanks" Christina rolled her eyes,

"My house, my rules Torres" Callie sighed and moved back into the kitchen. From the kitchen she could hear Owen and Christina's voices but couldn't make out their words.

_Most likely taking about you_

As she filled up the glass she had taken from the cupboard she noticed her hands were still trembling. She set the glass down on the bench and put her hand out in front of her. Callie cursed quietly and shook her hands in front of her body trying to make them their usual steady selves. It didn't work. Giving up she picked up her glass again and walked back out into the lounge area stretching a smile over her face.

'Night, thanks guys for everything" Owen smiled and Christina peered up at her,

"We'll talk tomorrow yeah?" Even though Callie could hear the concern in her voice at that moment all she wanted to do was go home and never talk about anything ever again. She didn't want Christina in her business she didn't want her asking what had happened or why she collapsed. She was already embarrassed enough. Callie nodded and Christina seemed content saying goodnight as Callie disappeared down the hall.

Yes. Christina Yang was worried. She looked towards Owen who was watching her closely.

"you okay" he asked,

"Yeah I'm fine"

"Is Callie okay?" Christina looked at him and shook her head,

"I don't Owen, I don't know" Owen, the gentleman he was didn't ask for the details, letting Callie have her privacy.

"let me know if I can do anything Chris" She smiled up at him before leaning into him. He smiled back at her and laid his arm around her shoulder as she snuggled into his side. This was the Christina he loved. It wasn't that he didn't love the rest of her as well but he loved seeing the warm, loving, caring side of Christina that he was privileged enough to see when she looked at him and as she watched Callie leaving.

* * *

It didn't take long for Callie to fall asleep after she got into bed that night. It didn't matter that it was a different bed and as she pulled out her laptop and turned it on she lay back for a second waiting for it to load.

It was later in the evening when Christina quietly opened the door and saw Callie sound asleep lying on the bed with her laptop lying on her stomach. She tiptoed into the room and pulled the computer off her, closing it and placing it on the dressing table. She then reached over her friend and pulled the cover further around her. She couldn't help but smile when Callie moved around snuggling further into the bed.

**Please Review!**

**And thank you so much to everyone who has been reviewing : )**


	9. Chapter 9

**Heart made to be broken**

**Chapter 9:**

It had been half an hour since Christina had dropped Callie off at her place that morning and the dark haired woman had been standing in front of the mirror in a simple black set of underwear for at least eighteen of those thirty minutes. She took in every mark on her body, memorised every curve and moved into the kitchen digging around in the draws to find a tape measure.

She felt a surge of adrenaline rush through her when her hands finally closed around the object and rushed back to the bedroom. She had woken up that morning ready to go. After a good night's sleep she felt a lot better. She was still exhausted however and as she sat and ate greasy eggs with Christina and Owen she couldn't help but notice Christina Yang's tiny body. She noticed the woman's small waist and thighs and she noticed how much love swirled in Owen Hunt's eyes every single time he looked at her. She noticed how perfectly the small woman fit against Owen's body and how the two of them looked so perfect together.

She loved the two of them to death they were both amazing friends and beautiful people no matter how much Christina denied it. But she couldn't stop the surge of jealousy that spread through her veins like fire when she felt the green eyed monster rear it's very ugly head.

_But there was only one ugly monster in that kitchen that morning._

By the time she'd gotten away from under Christina's watchful eye and convinced her that she would be fine Callie finally stepped back into the silence of her own place she found herself feeling even more physically exhausted. But that didn't stop her mind from remembering Christina's figure and then before she could stop it her mind flew to the similar figure of Addison's then Meredith's and Stevens. And it was simple...so very simple and clear in her mind.

Christina had Owen.

Meredith had the new hot surgeon from orthopaedics who was quickly becoming Callie's mortal enemy. But that was another story.

Addison had Derek. Derek who had chosen Addison over her.

And Izzie had George. George who like Derek had chosen Izzie Stevens over her.

Derek who had cheated on her with Addison.

George who had cheated on her with Stevens.

It was so simple.

And so half an hour later she had ended up standing in front of the mirror with a tiny notebook that she opened and began to circle the tape measure around her hips and then her bust. She measured her stomach and her thighs and her calves. She measured everything. And then recorded every single measurement into the small book.

And then she weighed herself pulling out the scales from under the sink once again an uncomfortable sense of déjà vu encompassing her.

She watched the numbers rise feeling sick all over again.

60, 62, 63, 65, 68, 70, 74

Her heart jolted

73,72...

She waited for the number to go down once more.

But it didn't.

Callie stood atop of the scales her mouth open in horror. She hadn't lost anything. She'd gained.

She'd gained an entire kilogram.

_The eggs._

She knew she should have tried harder to convince Christina she didn't want the eggs. If nothing else her friend was persistent...but she was an idiot and lazy.

_You should have tried harder, thought of a good excuse not give in so easily. _

All of a sudden the sick feeling building in her stomach shot upwards and Callie turned abruptly and fell to her knees in front of the toilet vomiting. She coughed and raised a hand to flush the toilet when she was done. As she stood she suddenly felt lighter and stopped for a moment turning to stare back at the toilet. But only a second later she shook her head ridding her mind of the mad thought. She was not going to throw up to lose weight. That wasn't healthy...ever.

Exercise however was very healthy.

Callie got dressed quickly and walked out into her kitchen flipping open her laptop as she did.

_Exercises at home_ she typed into the search bar. As the computer loaded she grabbed out her bin from under the sink and dragged it towards the fridge opening the door she decided it was time to give it a serious clean out. The first thing Callie set her hands on were the eggs. The carton came right out of the door and were dropped into the bin below it without hesitation.

Along with the eggs went the cheese next to it and the bottle of cola from the door which went down the sink. Callie pulled out a ceramic bowl which was filled with left over pasta before it went to and as she sat the bowl on the counter she realised she didn't actually have that much in her fridge.

As she leant against the counter her eyes dropped to the freezer below it and she scowled already knowing what was in there. She moved forwards and pulled out the tub of ice cream considering it with disgust before she let it drop into the bin as well. The pastry she had been keeping in her freezer as well as the cheesecake she and Addison had been sharing the week before last all joined it.

On a roll Callie moved to the cupboards and swung the pantry door open. Chips, biscuits, snacks, pasta, the pasta sauces in fact a lot went into the bin.

Ten minutes later she nodded with satisfaction as she shut the bin outside of her apartment block before walking back inside. Callie paused however as she pressed the button on the lift and looked to the door to its left. Abandoning the lift Callie pushed the door open and began to climb the stairs.

Her head was pounding when she made it to the top having jogged half the way up but ignored her mind when the doctor's words along with Christina's advice to take it easy flashed through her mind for a second.

By that afternoon Callie stared at her fridge with satisfaction. It was full of vibrant colour.

Red capsicums and tomatoes

Yellow pineapple and banana's

Orange carrots and oranges (funnily enough)

Green lettuce, brussel sprouts, peas

white cauliflower and potatoes

purple radishes and grapes

After she had returned from shopping she had also filled water bottles with water so it would be cold and left it to be the only beverage in her house.

Satisfied with her efforts she finally turned back to her computer after abandoning it for several hours. It only took her another hour to have written out the best exercises she could do that appeared to have the best effect.

Sit ups

Push ups

Squats

Weights

Yoga was recommended on a lot of sites as well and Callie noted to look into it but no matter what site she went on every site recommended running.

According to many exercise junkies, personal trainers even doctors running was the best and ideal way to shed the kilos. She did know that. And before she even knew what she was doing she had her sneakers in her hands and had grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

This time by the time she reached the bottom of the stairs Callie didn't feel tired instead she felt energised, powerful. She was motivated and excited from all the changes she'd made that day; from all the decisions she'd made. She headed down the street her feet beating the disappearing pavement beneath as she gained speed and promised herself that no matter what she'd stick to it. Not even as the skies of Seattle opened up and the rain fell did Callie stop.

She did stop a while later when a car pulled up beside her, a very nice car at that. A very nice car that was vaguely familiar,

"Torres?" Callie was almost wheezing and her face was bright as she turned to him and almost groaned when she realised who it was,

"Sloan?" her breath wheezed out of her throat breathily,

"Callie what are you doing?"

"Um...running" He rolled his eyes allowing his foot to ease off the break a little further,

"It's raining Torres"

"Sloan go away !" She all but yelled before she coughed. Suddenly she bent over her hands on her knees and she heard the car next to her break suddenly and a car door slammed.

Then suddenly hands were on her shoulders and Mark was pulling her upright. She coughed harder,

"Jesus Torres, how long have you been running"

"Go AWAY" she breathed out forcefully completely unsure of how long it was that she had been running and he backed up. Mark watched Callie check her watch and didn't fail to notice her eyes widen in disbelief making it more than obvious that she had been running for a long time,

"Callie just let me take you home" She looked up at him disbelieving,

"You're kidding right, NO"

"please!"

"NO Sloan if you think I'm going to get in a car with you, you are compl—"

"I'll call Christina" The look that he received with the three words that had erupted from his mouth made him want to scamper back towards his car and drive away without looking back. Suddenly she started forward and for a second he thought she was going to punch him but instead he turned to watch her as she stormed around the other side of his car and got in. His whole body flinched as he heard her slam the door harshly.

It was a thoroughly awkward ride home Callie only speaking to give him directions. He knew the sole reason she was in his car was so he wouldn't ring Christina. The one reason was because he'd threatened her, blackmailed her, whatever it was.

Nice going Sloan.

**Hi guys I'm sorry it's been so incredibly long had some family dramas but hopefully I'm back to good now I hope you guys are still with me and any reviews would be so immensely incredibly appreciated...please **

**Thanks guys **

**Nina xx**


	10. Chapter 10

**A heart made to be broken **

**Chapter 10  
**

The drive back to Callie's was...well awkward. And silent. Which only caused it to be even more awkward. Callie's head was leaning against the cool glass and although she was silent Mark could still see her chest rising and falling heavily. He wanted to ask her if she was okay. But he wasn't going to risk the surgeon opening the door probably while the car was still running and rolling herself out of it.

Ok so maybe that was a bit extreme but he was pretty sure she'd at least demand that he pull over so she could get out. He wanted to ask her how long she had been running for and why she had in fact been running in the rain.

He knew it had been low, to threaten her with a call to a friend. And Christina Yang nonetheless. But it had only been that morning that he'd overheard Owen and Christina talking and had caught the name of the woman now sitting next to him, while he hadn't heard what they'd said exactly their tone hadn't been the lightest and he could see the worry on their faces a mile away. They drove for a good twenty minutes and it wasn't until Mark turned the car off that he turned towards her slightly, gathering up his courage to finally ask her a question,

"Did you run all the way from your house?" he asked gently not wanting to upset her but he cringed when he saw her eyes narrow and the only answer he received was Callie getting out of the car. Mark sighed and turned the car back on reversing while hitting the button to send his window down,

"No problem Torres" he yelled not even realising what he was doing. It was then that Mark received the second glare of the day, oh and if looks could kill. He'd have been dead a long, long time ago.

"I didn't ask you for your help Sloan" she bit back before she pushed the door to her apartment building open disappearing inside it. Mark let his head fall back against the head rest and hit the steering wheel with his palm several times.

_Why was she so frustrating?_

Callie collapsed exhaustedly on the couch sighing loudly as she threw the phone onto the cushion beside her. She'd only just hung up the phone after a horribly draining phone call to Chief Webber. And to say the man was not impressed was an understatement. He'd demanded to see her in his office at nine o'clock the next morning and Callie was already anxiously dreading the next morning. Was he going to fire her? He'd already demoted her when her marriage had crumbled apart, was this the final straw for the man? Callie sighed again; it wouldn't be that much of a surprise. Everyone else eventually gave up on her, why not him too?

She was late. _Great start Torres._

She'd woken up on the couch in the same clothes as the day before, the plate she'd had her dinner on still sitting on the table along with a bottle of water and the TV still illuminated the room.

It was her phone that had woken her up and Callie had never been more thankful to Christina Yang in her life. Forgetting about the text she scurried around the house and thirty minutes later she had all but ran into the hospital and cursed her body when her side twinged painfully. Ducking into the elevator she almost cursed aloud when she saw George O'Mallie and Izzie Stevens their hands joined leaning lazily against the wall. George offered her a hesitant smile but she ignored it turning away from them before the doors closed.

_Just great. _

Two stops later Alex Karev already adorning the resident light blue scrubs joined the trio and Callie caught him visibly cringe at the group as he joined them. He threw her a small smile before standing next to her,

"Torres" she smiled lightly thankful that he was there,

"Karev" she greeted in reply,

"How are you?" she added,

"Started at four and just came from a lady with rather explosive diarrhoea" and if Callie had been hungry from her skipped breakfast she certainly wasn't now. She nodded her lips pressed together as her nose crinkled in displeasure,

"Thanks for that" he just laughed as the elevator arrived on the surgical floor,

"See ya later" she nodded as they exited the lift and she didn't care to turn back and see her ex shifting uncomfortably behind them.

Finally making it to the Chiefs office she sucked in a deep breath before raising a trembling hand to knock on the door. She heard the chief respond and she opened the door only to wish she hadn't.

Seriously, who was it up there that had it in for her? Obviously she'd done some serious wrong and Callie once again ignored the sharp pain that sliced through her chest as she was met with the sight of Derek Shepherd and Addison Montgomery in front of her.

"Well I think we're finished here, don't you?" she heard the chief say,

_What had they been talking about? Surely it wouldn't….they wouldn't. Had they heard? Had Christina said something…Owen? _

Callie felt the bile rise in her stomach as Derek nodded standing up quickly,

"Thanks Richard" he said and Addison offered the Chief a large smile before turning gracefully on her heel and heading out the office without so much as a glance in Callie's direction. Derek on the other hand stared blatantly towards her and it was Callie who didn't return his gaze,

"Take a seat Dr. Torres" she sat carefully and swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat,

_This was it._

"I understand that you left work early the other day; care to explain?" he asked and she couldn't help but cast her eyes downwards. After a few seconds the chief spoke once again,

"Callie is there something going on that I need to know?" he asked and this time she could hear the curiosity in his voice as well as the annoyance his first question had exuded. She shook her head in response,

"No chief it's fine" but even she had to admit that she didn't sound very convincing,

"You've had the last couple of days off without notice Callie….Look I don't know what to think" he sighed,

"You have patients relying on you. Doctors and the rest of the surgical staff were mixed up as well as the board and the patients. You didn't answer my calls…no one had any answers for me. So what is it that's going on?" he asked firmly and Callie felt the guilt well up inside of her,

"I….." She didn't know what to say. Why hadn't she already thought of this? She cursed her own idiocy once again,

"I …chief I was in hospital" she finally blurted out and caught the man in front of her sharply turn back to look her way,

"I'm sorry?" Callie gulped,

"I was admitted into Mercy West the day before yesterday and I was in there overnight. I was out for most of it otherwise I would have called…I just…." She trailed off not knowing how to finish,

"Why….uh..are you okay?" the chief finally asked and she nodded automatically,

"Fine"

"May I ask what happened?" he then asked more softly,

"It was nothing I just …..it was nothing" she finished lamely. She was not about to tell the chief of surgery that she had collapsed from exhaustion. He would suspend her from surgeries in a heartbeat. And she needed to work. If nothing else, she needed to work.

"Why did you go to Mercy West?" the chief asked curiously,

"I mean why not here, you know we would have looked after you" Callie nodded hearing the slight offence in his voice.

"I was …I passed out, ambulance took me there" she responded hesitantly and it was then that the chief leant back in his chair and she could feel his gaze on her,

"Callie….should you be working?" he asked,

"Yes I'm fine, they cleared me there. They didn't particularly know why it happened. Bloods came back fine, everything was fine. They kept me in for obs and all of that was fine too. I'm fine. Better than fine" she had never said the word fine so many times in one sentence. Or in one week. She was starting to hate the four letter word.

"Exhaustion? Working too hard, I mean you have been taking some long shifts lately, stress?" the Chief guessed but Callie shook her head adamantly not allowing him to travel down that path,

"No Chief, it's not really…I've ..everything's fine" there it was again. After several moments of silence finally the chief answered,

"Alright take the rest of the day off and come back tomorrow if you're feeling well enough. If not give me a call" Callie looked up sharply at the Chief,

"Really?" she asked and his brow creased slightly,

"What were you expecting?" he asked. She felt herself flush and shook her head,

"No…nothing. Um ..okay ….I could work today..if you need me, I'm fine" but the chief shook his head and looked at her,

"Not today, go home catch up on rest, get a good meal into you and come back ready to start tomorrow. Callie, you know that I'm here….if you need anything" Callie felt her throat tighten and she gulped again clearing her throat,

"Thanks Chief" she said and nodded before standing up. She knew she couldn't stay in the room any longer. She had to get out of there. Had to leave before his concern overwhelmed her and she was reduced to some blubbering mess in front of her superior. The chief at that.

_Yeah that would look great._

Once he'd bid her farewell she didn't hesitate to scamper out of the office and head back towards the elevator. She wanted to head the other way. To the locker rooms, to change into her scrubs and to walk into the OR and save someone. She wanted to cut. Nothing more. She wanted to work.

But not today. After all she was just thankful that she still had a job.

Derek Shepherd leant back on the chair pushing the charts away from him and letting out a loud sigh.

What was happening here? He'd had a great couple of last days with Addison and he'd walked into work that morning with a large smile on his face. Their date had gone flawlessly and Addison had spent the night with him in the trailer.

But now all he felt was …hollow….guilt. And before he could help it his mind flew to the horrible expression he'd seen on Callie's face that morning. Callie. He hadn't spoken a single word to her since that night. He hadn't heard from her, asked for her. He swallowed as the guilt built up inside of him. The neurosurgeon sighed again and jumped slightly as Mark walked into the room, Owen following close behind him. Both men in dark blue scrubs stretched their limbs tiredly,

"You okay man?" Mark asked catching the movement and Derek shrugged.

"How was the surgery" Derek asked and Owen smiled,

"Went off without a hitch" he nodded, impressed, he'd seen the films.

"So what's going on?" Mark asked as he collapsed into a chair beside Derek while Owen flicked on the automatic coffee machine,

"What nothing, why?"

"Cause you've got that..the whole world just blew up in my face and I don't know what to do look going on again" Derek just rolled his eyes at his friend and shrugged but like usual he was quick to give in and Mark looked up curiously when Derek began to explain,

"I saw Callie this morning….she looked..I don't know" Mark frowned thinking of the day before and Owen who still faced away from the other two frowned lightly,

"She looked sick or something I don't know…do you think I should talk to her?" Mark shrugged but before he could answer Owen turned towards Derek,

"Is she back at work" the men had discussed only the day before of Callie's sudden disappearance and Owen had been caught up on the whole story. He hadn't however let the two old friends in on the fact that Christina had been baby sitting a discharged Callie from the Mercy West emergency room the day before. He didn't think Callie would appreciated that much.

He'd felt instantly bad after hearing the story and groaned as he remembered pulling Christina onto his lap and kissing her right in front of Callie the night before. He wondered why Christina hadn't said anything or pushed him away at all. It didn't seem right. He was pulled out of his thoughts by the shrill sound of Derek's pager as it went off. Derek sighed and stood quickly before he answered,

"I'm not sure I saw her heading into the chiefs office, I gotta take this can you put those back for me" Mark nodded when Derek gestured the charts spread out on the table and Derek thanked him before leaving the room. Once the door had swung shut the plastic surgeon turned to Owen and the man raised an eyebrow in question,

"I…uh I kind of ran into Callie yesterday" Mark said and Owen could hear the uneasiness in Marks' voice. He wasn't quite sure where the man stood when it came to Callie. From what he'd heard Mark and Callie were sworn enemies and he hadn't heard the surgeon say anything exactly nice about her since he'd arrived in fact usually it was the downright opposite. But Owen knew concern when he saw it and it was painted on Mark Sloan's face,

"What do you mean, was she here?" Mark shook his head and Owen's curiosity peaked,

"I was driving home yesterday…she was out running" Owen eyes widened now,

"Yesterday" when Mark threw him a questioning glance before nodding Owen shook his head hoping that he'd hidden his surprise and was relieved when Mark continued,

"She'd obviously been running for a while. I don't know she was out of it, there's no way she would have made it home. So I….well I threatened to call Christina if she didn't get in the car" amusement caused Owen's expression to change this time,

"And did she?" he asked. Mark nodded,

"But she was not one happy chappy" when Mark's pager went off a moment later he sighed getting up,

"Do you think we should do anything?" Mark asked him in the same concerned way Derek had before. And Owen simply shrugged,

"I don't know" he admitted honestly,

"I thought you hated Callie?" he asked and it was Marks turn to shrug,

"Well…yeah I don't like her …but you know…I have to work with her and all and I'd rather avoid having to fix her mistakes if she can't operate properly" he said and Owen nearly smirked at his rushed and lame explanation.

"Reckon you can put those back?" Mark said nodding at the charts deflecting the attention away from his pathetic excuse. Owen did laugh this time and nodded. Once the door had closed for the second time Owen felt the frown from before fall back onto his face.

What exactly was going on here?

What was going on with the famous orthopaedic surgeon he'd heard so much about?

**Hii, hope you guys are still there : ) I decided I really want to get back into this one. After my computer crashed and I lost all my plans and half the story I kind of lost all my motivation but here's another chapter and I really hope you guys like it.**

**Please review and let me know what you think (prettttty please : ) **

**Thanks for reading,**

**Nina xx**


	11. Chapter 11

**Heart made to be broken **

**Chapter 11**

Owen Hunt stretched his arms high above his head cringing as his shoulders cracked. His back ached but it was only to be expected after leaning over the operating table for four hours. His jaw stretched this time as a yawn took over his face as he arrived at the on call room. After stepping in Owen shut the door and pulled his stethoscope from around his neck and his pager from his pants placing them on the table with two more identical items. Looking towards the bed in the room he smiled softly,

"Hey" Cristina Yang said from where she lay on her back her arms folded behind her head. Before answering the man simply walked to the bed kicking off his shoes before climbing in beside her. He pressed a kiss to her forehead before laying down and wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"Hey, heard you were pretty kick ass in the OR today"

"I'm always kick ass" Owen snorted at her cockiness laughing. He quickly however remembered what it was that he had wanted to speak to her about all day,

"Hey about Callie" he said and Cristina sighed before he could add any more,

"The whole thing...she's...there's something off...something I'm missing or ..I don't know, something's wrong though"she said and Owen nodded,

"Did you know that Callie and Derek were dating?" he asked his head tilted to the left to see her face not that he needed to since her body flung upwards so fast Owen jumped himself,

"WHAT!" she almost yelled,

"I'll take that as a no" he said realising that really no one had known.

"Bull...there's no way.. it's Callie and ..._Derek..._Derek as in soppy head shephard what the hell?" Owen just shook his head,

"Hold on but Mer was saying how he's back with Montgomery and they were all lovey dovey down in the cafeteria the other day...and the scrub room and the patients room God they are sickening. Tell your friend to grow a pair hunt, he's less and less McDreamy everyday. It's just sickening to look at him now" she said and Owen grinned at the dislike in her tone,

"And why are you looking at him exactly?" he teased,

"Well if it's any consolation it makes me puke a little" she said bluntly and Owen chuckled,

"Wait...dating, dating? Derek and Callie were dating?" she asked as if she was just processing the words that Owen had spoken,

"Derek and Mark told me the other day. He said he had wanted to keep it down after the whole Meredith and Addison thing and that Callie hadn't disagreed especially after everything with George and all" Cristina just nodded at his explanation,

"I can't believe none of us knew" Cristina said,

"Mere would have an MI if she knew" Owen nodded,

"Chris there's more" he paused for a second and Cristina frowned,

"Derek was still dating Callie when Addison happened" he said quietly images of the orthopaedic surgeon filtering through his mind,

"What!" Cristina almost yelled before he could finish and he could see the outrage on her face,

"He cheated on her?" she asked angrily and Owen didn't have to nod for Cristina to get the answer,

"Oh my God I'm going to kill that man. What the hell is wrong with him? After everything she's been through! And he _cheats_ on her!" Owen just listened to the mini rant and while he hadn't been around for the George and Callie marriage he had heard from several people that it hadn't ended well and Callie had suffered greatly.

"She's not okay, no matter how many times she keeps saying she is, she's not okay" Owen nodded in agreement,

"I know"

"I just don't know what to do for her"

"Well another thing that probably isn't going to brighten the day up any.." Owen said and Cristina focused on him once again,

"What?" she asked,

"After Derek had left Mark said that he ran into Callie yesterday" Owen recalled almost apprehensively. Christina wasn't protective over many people, she didn't care what they did as long as it didn't effect her in any way. Along with him it was Meredith that he had ever seen her truly care for. But Callie was different. Their was a friendship between the two that while Owen wasn't sure how had formed exactly he knew that Cristina was definitely protective over the woman as the surgeon was over Cristina. He wondered if it had happened after Callie had broken up with George.

"Oh great!" Cristina's sarcastic tone made Owen focus once more,

"What did he say to her this time. You know I really don't get hi-"

"Cris, Callie was out running..._yesterday_..Mark saw her when he was driving home" he said before she could finish her sentence,

"He drove her home, said she was exhausted, that she wouldn't have made it home" Cristina just watched him frowning slightly,

"I picked her up from the hospital for exhaustion and malnutrition. _Exhaustion! _And she's out running!" she exclaimed,

"Is she working?" Cristina asked suddenly and Owen shook his head,

"Chief said she was having the day off, she'll be back tomorrow" Cristina nodded,

"I'm going to go over there" Cristina said,

"Cris it's the middle of the night, you can't just go over there. Talk to her in the morning. She's got a surgery at eight" Cristina paused for several seconds before sighing and dropping back down on the bed. Owen squeezed her shoulders again, turning his head to kiss hers,

"I know it's frustrating not knowing what's going on" he said softly and she let her head fall onto his chest,

"She just won't talk to me...anyone. I can't believe Derek did that" she said again and Owen just nodded,

"I know he feels pretty guilty about it from what I can tell"

"Good so he should" Owen couldn't help but smile at her tenacity another thing he loved about her. Her loud yawn drew his attention back to her and her nose crinkled when he raised an amused eyebrow,

"Shutup" she laughed before her lips descended on his and he wasted no time in pulling her on top of him.

* * *

It wasn't until the lunchtime the following day that Cristina was able to catch Callie but as she rounded the corner and entered the pit to find Owen she saw her leaning over a young boy inspecting his shoulder which even from across the room looked severely swollen. Callie looked up to his distressed parents saying something to make the family chuckle as she ruffled the boys hair before stepping out of the makeshift patient room pulling the curtain closed. As she headed towards the desk, chart in hand, Cristina beelined towards her quickly catching Owen's eyes who threw her a smile,

"Hey how are you?" Callie looked up as she leant on the bench between them,

"Hey, I'm good" she said with a wide smile but before Cristina could add anything she continued,

"And listen Cris thanks for all your help and Owen I'll have to thank him if I get the chance this place is insane at the moment" Christina waved her hand dismissing the gratitude while nodding quickly throwing a glance behind her at the chaotic emergency room,

"It's fine how are you feeling?" she asked and Callie looked up at her again, pausing her writing,

"I'm fine Chris seriously I'm fine I got a good night's sleep and had a big dinner" In truth she had ended up grilling two pieces of toast and throwing one out but she had eaten, none the less. She looked up from her chart when she felt Christina's eyes on her again,

"What Chris?" the woman sighed,

"I was talking with Owen who has obviously spoken to Mark who said that he had to drive you home the day before yesterday when he found you out running" Cristina said a few volumes lower and Callie just stared at her,

"Callie what the hell were you doing out running? You were in hospital two days ago!" she exclaimed at a whisper but Callie seemed to have gathered herself and answered,

"I just needed some fresh air that's all. Don't worry" Callie said hoping Christina would let it go. The intern watched her for several moments.

"Call-"

"Christina. I promise you it's okay alright. There is nothing to worry about" she said stretching a wide smile on her face,

"And Mark is an ass so don't listen to what he has to say. He wants trouble, he always does" Callie said and Cristina could hear the obvious comtempt in her voice. Before anything else could be said Alex sidled up beside her grabbing her pen causing Callie to throw him a mock scowl. He laughed and she looked down before she smiled, genuinely this time,

"X-rays ready for my patient, got to go Cris but we'll talk soon and everything's fine trust me" she said before she stole her pen back, closed the chart and spun around to escape her gaze.

Several moments later Owen stopped beside her with his own set of charts,

"Hey" he said capturing her attention,

"Hey" she replied quietly still deep in thought,

"So, what did she say?" he asked and Cristina focused on him,

"Nothing" she said with annoyance,

"She played it off...and I definitely don't believe her"

"Not at all"

* * *

**Cristina and Owen and in on it now...more of Callie's pov next chapter and some more mark and callie interaction i believe :)**

**Just have to write it :)**

**Let me know what you think, i know that's it's been years but if any of you are still there i'd really appreciate knowing what you think **

**Thanks,**

**Nina**


	12. Chapter 12

**A heart meant to be broken**

**Chapter 12:**

* * *

Chief Webber sat at his desk and sighed as he ran a hand over his head, through his short hair. He blinked several times before he placed the case he was reading back down on the table his head swimming. It was impossible right? There was no way they could pull this off...unless.

Callie Torres. He knew that the woman could do this. Well, he wasn't sure that anyone could do this but if there was one person he knew that he could entrust this case with it would be his top orthopaedic surgeon. But there was something that was making him hesitate, something making him second guess. It had been almost a fortnight since Callie had come back to work, after her hospitalization for what he still didn't know, and she was certainly topping the hospital stats. He was almost tempted to go downstairs and check that she wasn't living in the hospital basement again. But the surgeon was flying through cases and surgeries along with clocking an impressive amount of time in the ER.

Perhaps a case like this was what she needed, something to focus on. He sighed. He knew he couldn't let a surgery like this be passed on to another hospital if she could do it. Not to mention the patient deserved the best and Dr. Callie Torres. His Dr. Callie Torres was the best. However he wasn't the chief for nothing and he knew that right now Dr. Callie Torres was not at her best. It was then that there was a knock on his door which was pushed open slightly, a moment later.

Half an hour later the case was spread out between them; the desk had disappeared beneath reams of paperwork, references, reports and x-rays and the chief watched his surgeon closely as she thought her eyes flicking between pages. He stood and slowly rounded the table causing Callie to look up,

"You have a think, I need a coffee anyway and I need to check the boards. Take your time but just know that I think that if anyone can do this, it would be you and you know that you would have the support of every other doctor in the place" Webber reached out his arm to squeeze Callie's shoulder slightly, who nodded her thoughts still far away, before he left the room clicking the door closed behind him.

Once the silence settled in the room Callie let out a deep sigh and leant back in the chair, her neck extended as she searched the ceiling for answers. When the Chief had called her to his office for the second time in under three weeks Callie had been almost sure that this time he was going to fire her. She had been momentarily bewildered wondering how he could fire her at the rate she was going through patients but maybe the chief had seen the small mistakes she had been making here and there. Perhaps he had seen how unorganised and ungrounded she had become. So when he had pushed a thick manilla folder towards her along with another large envelope that was bursting with films that only showed bones that needed to be fixed Callie had internally heaved a deep sigh of relief.

Work had been the only thing that had got her through the last few weeks in fact it almost felt as though it had been months since she'd been out of the hospital for longer than several hours; excluding the times that she went running. She'd gotten in the habit of running for half an hour to an hour before work and after work. Callie sighed again recalling how she'd missed the last three after work work-outs having been so tired when she got home that she'd crashed as soon as she sat down on the couch. Hell, several nights ago she'd nodded off sitting on the toilet.

Shaking herself from her thoughts Callie leant forward running a hand over her face before picking up the case overview.

Sixteen year old girl who was separated from her Siamese twin fourteen years ago. Severe, crippling kyphosis, lumbar lordosis. The case was wrought with risks, too many possibilities for something to go wrong, way too many potential mistakes to be made. Normally it would be something that Callie would go for. Sure, she would weigh the pros and cons but ultimately she would be giving a sixteen year old girl the chance to fit in, to be normal. Now though, she wasn't sure. Now she hesitated, now she second guessed herself.

Yes, she had a great surgical team but this case would need more than that. This case would need everything. Mostly though she would need Derek. Derek and a close second would be Mark if she wanted to give this girl a chance at life with minimal scarring, minimal reminders. It was one thing that she'd always admired about Mark's work. His suturing was envied by many from all disciplines in the hospital. A feeling welled deep within her making her feel ill, sick to her stomach. She wasn't ready for that. To work with him. To work with them.

She hadn't even spoken to him yet.

Spectacularly avoided him for three weeks, yes, but she hadn't even conversed with him about anything work related yet. It was still strange, even she could admit that to herself.

Going from speaking to Derek everyday to never; it was just strange.

Still, this wasn't about her. This was about the teenage girl, Laura, was her name. This was about Laura.

Standing up Callie stretched out her body hearing several cracks. Her neck still ached from her previous surgery and she couldn't contain her yawn as she picked up a recent set of xrays and held them up towards the windows carefully inspecting the displaced vertebrae.

She took several minutes, allowing her mind to whirl as plans and procedures filled her head. It was only when she held the film closer to inspect the second anterior rib which sat at an angle that made Callie wonder how painful breathing was for this high school student, that Callie was forced to endure another sight which made her feel quite ill.

It was only for a split second that Callie stopped focusing on the bone for her gaze to peer through the transparent x-ray. As a sharp pain seared through her chest Callie slowly lowered the film to see George O'Malley press a kiss to Izzy Steven's lips. A cold chill flooded the surgeon's body making her turn quickly until she was safely seated in her chair and the pressure was relieved from her shaky legs.

She hated this.

She wasn't weak.

And yet she was. She was weak and stupid and making mistakes. She was unorganised and unfocused. Callie sighed looking down at the messy table. She stood a second later ripping a piece of paper from the stack and scribbling her apology.

This girl might not be able to walk properly. She might have troubles and problems, daily.

But she wasn't in pain and she wasn't paralysed. She was still alive and hopefully she would realise that was enough.

* * *

**Hey guys, hope you like! Would love a review please! Thanks xxf**


	13. Chapter 13

**A heart made to be broken**

**Chapter 13**

Callie's feet thumped against the pavement and the even, rhythmic sound eased her as she continued along the pavement at a reasonably fast speed. Keeping her eyes ahead Callie took in the buildings and trees in front of her that all appeared to be surrounded by a golden halo. The sun was just beginning to rise behind them and she knew that once she made it to the top of the small hill she would be able to see the sun just as it rose over the horizon ready for another day.

When she finally did she took several deep breaths quickly tipping her head back to take several gulps of water from the drink bottle in her right hand. Finally she lowered herself to the ground and shivered slightly as the cool breeze moved across her sweaty skin. It wasn't long however before Callie felt her heart rate and breathing return to normal and she revelled in the feeling of her muscles tightening in her calves and stomach. She had certainly come a long way since she had started running. In the first few days she had almost felt as if she was going to suffocate when she came to a stop and she had been so shocked at how unfit she had become. Now she was able to run for a good length of time without bright dots dancing on her eyelids or a painful lump growing in her throat.

Callie didn't wait long before she stood up again and turned away from the stunning sight that was the sunrise to jog home again. It would be light by the time she reached her place and when she did she would hop into the shower, get dressed, grab an apple or something similar and head to work. The routine had been the same for almost three weeks now but the structure and the routine soothed her. For weeks on end she had felt out of control. She wasn't in control when somebody wanted to replace her with another or did things that affected her. She couldn't control everything, particularly at work. She had no idea who or what was going to come through the emergency doors. She had no idea what kind of accidents or catastrophes people had managed to be involved in. She usually had no idea what she would be doing the next day so the monotonous routine that had become her mornings allowed her to relax. She could decide to get up and go for a run, she could control where she ran and how fast she did. She could control what she would have for breakfast or what she would not have for breakfast. On the days where she was at work her routine would swap to night time and she had slowly learned to deal with the days where she was at the hospital for both times during the day. But no matter what, no matter when she arrived or left the hospital she would always find time to get a work out in sometime while she was off.

Slowly the orthopaedic surgeon began to feel better, more like herself. More normal. And yet there were still those moments.

The moments where she saw Derek or Addison even George or Izzy. Hell even Mark or Meredith. She liked emergency. She could spend copious amounts of time in emergency and hardly ever run into any of them. Sure they'd be there sometimes but if need be she could duck into a patients room and busy herself enough not to notice, not to think, not to feel.

She avoided the maternal unit like the plague. She wasn't ready to deal with Addison, not even close. She could deal with George or Izzy even Derek..just. There had been the one time already that she'd gotten stuck in an elevator with him. She'd bailed at the next floor not caring that he probably knew that she had no business on that floor. She'd needed air and there hadn't been any left in the small, four walled box she had been trapped in.

But Addison. She couldn't do Addison. Not yet.

There was still a part of her mind where she wondered if she was crazy. Was she over reacting, was Addison right? But the other half of her brain still couldn't comprehend the actions of her best friend. Hadn't they both been cheated on …in a way. Hadn't they both been played? Shouldn't they both be sculling tequila and aiming for Derek's head on a dart board.

Isn't that what should be happening?

Not this. Anything but this.

Callie turned on the spot picking up another chart from the nurses' station. She needed to do something. She needed to stop thinking. Just get on with it.

She couldn't think anymore. Not about Derek, not about Addison not about anyone. She just needed to work.

* * *

Mark Sloan strode down the corridor and into the Chief's office who looked up a frown quickly contorting his features,

"Dr Sloan is there a problem?" he asked and Mark only took a moment to glance at the two suited men sitting in the chairs before the chief,

"Yes there is can I have a word?" he asked and the chief nodded before excusing himself and stepping out of the office closing the door,

"What the hell are we doing letting a case like Laura Reynold's go?" the chief sighed but his eyebrows rose in question of how the plastic surgeon had come to know about the case,

"I just came from a consult with her. Her mother set it up, she wanted my opinion, I think maybe it's possible that this girl could have a normal life. The mother says that you said no. Have you told Torres about this, she could do it?" Mark said and the chief drew in a large breath. He hadn't expected Marie to contact Mark Sloan or anyone within the walls of the Seattle Grace again. Then again she was a mother, a dedicated mother willing to do whatever it took to get her daughter better,

"I have in fact spoken with Dr Torres Mark"

"You have?" Mark asked in surprise, slightly taken aback,

"Yes"

"And she said no?" he asked confused,

"She said no" the chief confirmed and he was glad to see the same confusion and wonder that he himself had experienced when Callie Torres had denied the surgery.

"Torres said no?" Mark asked again and this time the chief simply nodded.

"That's crap, she could do this, look what she did for that other kid" Mark said but before the chief could interrupt him the surgeon continued,

"She could give this girl a new life, one where she can walk and run and do everything else that she wants to do, anything. Torres doesn't pass stuff like this up, why did she? Plus this surgery would be great for the hospital and for her and what abou-" A raised hand from the chief stopped Mark mid-rant and the man took a breath before stepping back slightly and folding his arms,

"I have already presented Dr. Torres with the case, she says that it's not worth it, the risk is too large. It's her call Dr. Sloan" he concluded with a shrug before turning back towards the door,

"I have a meeting I must get back to. There's nothing more we can do for her Dr. Sloan, not here, not unless we have an ortho on board and I don't think Thompson or Felps would be up for it" the chief disappeared back into the office leaving a frustrated Mark Sloan standing in the corridor. Less than a minute later however he was striding down the hall back the way he had come.

"Hey has anyone seen Torres?" he asked as he approached the nurses station on the surgical floor,

"No" a chorus greeted him from various staff,

"Yeah she was in the pit I was down there a moment ago" one of the nurses replied and Mark frowned. He knew that she wasn't rostered on in the ER. Then again she hadn't been yesterday either and he'd seen her putting cast on a kid when he'd left the day before. She'd been there a lot lately, he'd noticed. He should have known that she was most likely to be found there. Unless she was in the OR, lately the only other place that anyone would find Torres, if she was in the hospital, was in the ER. He'd seen her name on the board everyday he was there and he knew that Owen had noticed as well. He wondered if she'd had a day off in the two weeks that had passed. He'd barely spoken to her since the running incident even though he often found himself wondering how she was.

_What the hell was going on with him?_

"Seen Torres?" he asked Own as he walked into the emergency room and Owen looked up from his charts before nodding,

"Yep she's here again" he said and Mark nodded knowing that Owen was concerned as well. The trauma surgeon pointed to one of the bays where Mark spotted a flash of black hair. He nodded his thanks to Owen before beginning towards it,

"Torres" he said as she yanked the curtain open only to jump in surprise, not expecting him to be standing there. Her eyes narrowed but she turned and smiled at the patient before pulling the curtain across again and swiveling back around to face him,

"What are you doing Sloan?" she asked and he couldn't help but cringe at her tone,

"What the hell are you doing Torres, you're not one to back off when it gets tough, let go of a challenge?" he said accusingly and it was obvious that she had no idea what he was talking about,

"Laura Reynolds" he stated and Callie sent him a look before rolling her eyes,

"It's not a challenge Sloan it's a disaster waiting to happen. She's not in pain now and the surgery is a huge risk" she said and while he knew that her words made perfect sense it was usually the rest of the hospital telling her the same thing while she tried to convince them otherwise, convince them that it was possible that she could do it. He didn't like the new Torres. He wanted the one that would take this surgery and run with it back. He missed that Callie Torres.

_He missed her? Hold up. No._

He shook his head, equally at his own thoughts and at her words, clearing it and turned to follow her,

"Callie" he paused,

_Callie? Since when have I ever called her that?_

"I said no Sloan" she stated firmly and he sighed as she entered one of the trauma rooms closing the door on him before he could say anything else. And the blinds shut one minute later just in case he hadn't gotten the message before.

* * *

**Hey guys thanks so much for the reviews from last chapter they are much appreciated!  
**

**I really hope you like this chapter and if anyone has anything they'd particularly like to see happen in this story let me know! I have several ideas however i feel like i'm missing something, i need a filler bit before some other things can happen. Any ideas?**

**Thanks, and review please!**

**Nina xx**


	14. Chapter 14

**A heart made to be broken**

**Chapter 14**

The house was almost dark, only the television playing some an old black and white movie continued to cast a small amount of light into it. Her shoes, bag, jacket and hair clip lay on the ground by the foot of the chair and Addison sighed as she leant back in the wooden frame closing her eyes. Her finger ran over a slight depression in the wood of the dining table and the surgeon sighed once more before tipping the large, deep wine glass back. Moments later she grasped the bottle that sat beside her and refilled the glass watching the red liquid rise.

The door behind her almost made her flinch but she was too tired to bother,

"Hey Ad" Derek greeted as he placed his bag on the table and leant down to kiss her cheek. She, however, didn't move and her eyes didn't stray from her glass,

"Ad you alright?" he asked a moment later bending down beside her to try and catch her eye. She let an uneasy silence settle over them for a moment before she spoke,

"I know what happened with Callie Derek" her voice was soft, almost inaudible, but he heard her and she heard the strangled sound that came from his throat before he stood up straight,

"Ad" he whispered and this time she turned to him,

"I've known for over two weeks" she said and her eyes welled as she spoke the words out loud. This time Derek's brow creased and she could see the confusion in his eyes, she looked down at him turning her body to face him properly where he was crouched at her side,

"Ad, I don't…." his words were confused and trailed off as he ran out of things to say. She swallowed the lump in her stomach and raised her hand to caress his cheek. She could feel the slight stubble beneath her soft skin but quickly refocused on his eyes. Not that she'd always found it easy to focus when she was staring at them either.

"Callie and I went to lunch a couple weeks ago" she explained and she could hear the nerves shake her voice that was usually as steady as her surgical hand,

"She told me" she confessed,

"She told me everything. That you….._cheated_ on her with me" her words dripped with disgust but she didn't remove her hand from his cheek,

"Ad….I" but he didn't know what to say, he had nothing to say. He knew what he had done and he knew that he would have to face the consequences. He could only hope and pray that he wouldn't lose the woman before him. He had been given a second chance, and he could only beg to the heavens above that he hadn't blown it.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked a moment later and she shook her head, red hair flying while she sucked a deep breath of air in,

"I don't know, I don't know Derek" her voice was bordering on hysterical and his eyes flickered to the wine bottle that was almost three quarters empty,

"It's okay" he said placing a hand on her knee and caressing her skin with his thumb,

"It's not Derek, that's just it, it's not okay, callie" when her friends name left her lips her face screwed up and she leant down until her head was against her knees, shielding the view of her face from him. Her shoulders began to shake and Derek reached up to run his hands through her hair.

It took several minutes for Addison to calm down but she wasn't done. He still frowned taking in the smudged mascara on her pale skin,

"Derek, I said she was wrong, I said she was trying to break us up. I didn't want to…I love you" he held her gaze. It was the first time the three words had been shared between them since they got back together,

"I love you Derek" Addison continued,

"And I don't regret what happened that day because I want to be with you. I want to…I've always wanted you, I never wanted you to leave, I never wanted Mark, I want you, I love you" she said and Derek moved up onto his knees to kiss her. Their lips met and he pulled Addison off the chair and into his lip. Her hands rested on the side of his face and one of his circled around her waist while the other ran through her hair,

"I love you too Ad" he whispered when they broke apart for air,

"I don't know what I'm doing Derek"

"Me either" She pulled back for a moment, her legs on either side of his waist,

"Do you feel bad?" she asked, watching him carefully but he didn't hesitate to answer,

"Yes Ad, so, so bad i….but I don't regret it either, I love you. I never stopped loving you Addison" he said and the conviction in his voice only caused her to lean forward and find his lips once again.

* * *

**Hey guys quick update. Addison and Derek will come into the story a bit more now and we'll see some more Mark and Callie along with Owen and Christina and Alex : )**

**Hope you guys are still enjoying it,**

**Quick review if you've got time would be much appreciated!**

**Thanks,**

**xoxox**


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